Jump Start # 668

3 John 9 I wrote something to the church; but Diotrephes, who loves to be first among them, does not accept what we say. For this reason, if I come, I will call attention to his deeds which he does, unjustly accusing us with wicked words; and not satisfied with this, he himself does not receive the brethren, either, and he forbids those who desire to do so and puts them out of the church.

Diotrephes was a real pill. He was a spiritual bully. He was a Christian, but one who simply didn’t get what it was all about. It seems that Diotrephes had his target set on John. He accused John unjustly. Not only bullied but he did so using “wicked words.” He refused to accept some Christians and “puts them out of the church.” The spirit of Diotrephes didn’t die with this man. It can be found in many places today. People that want to “run” the church. Power plays and power struggles and folks not getting their ways, so they use wickedness as a means to get what they want.

Bullies cause fear. This is true if we talk about middle school, power players at work, or the Diotrephes in the church. Bullies intimidate and use fear to control others. They like to make fun of people and be leaders of troublemakers. If you are small, different, kind, good, obedient you become the target of bullies. They think they are cool but they are not. Too many schools are having to deal with bullies. It’s a shame that they have to do this. Parents ought to be doing this, but bullies often become what they are from dysfunctional parents.

I’m going to age myself here, when I was in school, we didn’t have middle school. K-8, same building for me. High school was a different world. The high school I went to had major racial issues in the early 70’s. Fights, intimidation, fear, and bulling was normal. Bullies believe in developing a pecking order that they control. I have encountered bullies in the church. They talk tough and threaten often. They try to scare. The best way to deal with bullies is to stand up. Don’t let them have any ground. It takes a ton of courage to do that. This is exactly what John was doing to Diotrephes. If he came, he was calling him out. This would not be a fist fight. It would be an apostle taking the helm of the ship over and revealing the ungodly deeds of a man who isn’t acting like a Christian.

I have no respect for Christian bullies. I have a dear preaching friend of mine who encountered one recently.  This bully pretended to be another preacher. He’s not. He’s a bully. He uses long emails, threats and fear to try to make younger preachers be controlled by him. In the pretense of standing for the truth he used his bully tactics on my friend. It didn’t work. Spiritual bullies are the worse kind. We expect more, and we should from Christians. Spiritual bullies can use the pulpit to scare an audience into the behavior that they want. Spiritual bullies can find their way into the leadership of the church and use that position and role to control others. Shame on them!

Diotrephes should have been stopped immediately when he started using wicked words. Anyone that has to do that, has no argument and is desperate. This is not the behavior of Christians!

Spiritual bullies can’t handle silence. They long for a dog fight. When emails are not answered and threats are not countered they have nothing. All they can do is spread lies to their fellow bullies. No one of any count listens to them.  When the word of God is opened up to bullies they hush. God’s word used correctly will silence those who are wicked, falsely accusing and are not following the way of Christ.

Diotrephes goes down in history as a real jerk. I know of no one who would name their son after this man. Wanting to be first, he actually became last. He is used throughout history in sermons and classes as an example of pride and failure. He hurt the people of God. He was not like Jesus. The use of email, facebook and blogs have allowed those who are like Diotrephes to have an audience. They complain, ridicule, condemn and denounce good people who are trying to follow Jesus. They are bullies. Ignore them. Don’t read their rubbish. Get about doing the good that you know to do.

Diotrephes serves a purpose. Without his story, we wouldn’t know what to do today. John shows us. John was not getting in the mud with him and becoming a counter bully. Not at all. John stood with Jesus. Some things are wrong and need to be stopped in a Biblical fashion. It is amazing that one man can have such an impact upon a congregation.

Some of our readers know well what I am writing about. You could put names and faces to this story. May God give you the courage to stand with what is right. May you pray for a change of hearts and the spirit of Jesus to prevail. Bullies have problems: socially, emotionally, and especially spiritually. There are proper ways to do things, and force and fear isn’t the means to accomplish these.

Let the beauty of Jesus be seen in me, is more than a hymn. It’s the N.T. way. Paul said, “Christ is our life,” and on another occasion, “it is no longer I who lives, but Christ lives in me.” That’s the way it ought to be. That’s where we need to be.

Roger

Jump Start # 192

3 John 9-10 “I wrote something to the church; but Diotrephes, who loves to be first among them, does not accept what we say. For this reason, if I come, I will call attention to his deeds which he does, unjustly accusing us with wicked words; and not satisfied with this, he himself  does not receive the brethren, either, and he forbids those who desire to do so and puts them out of the church.”

  Ole’ Diotrephes was a real mess and worse than that, he was causing a mess. It seems that he had it in for the apostle John.

• John wrote something, but Diotrephes would not accept it
• John sent some brethren to them, but Diotrephes would have nothing to do with them and anyone who did, he made sure they were put out of the church
• He accused John with wicked words

  The only insight we learn is that he “loves to be first.” Did he think he was better qualified than John was to be an apostle? Did he think he could do things much better than what John was doing? Was he tired of all the wonderful things people were saying about John? Anything connected to John and you can be certain that Diotrephes was not going to have any part with it. His attitude was way out of order.

  The end of our passage today puzzled me—”he puts them out of the church.” Most folks want the church to grow—not Diotrephes, he puts them out of the church. If a person didn’t line up with the way Diotrephes thought things should be, he’d be in trouble, real quick.

  We can see some lessons here with this experience with Diotrephes.

1. Some folks just don’t get it. Just because someone is a Christian, doesn’t mean that they are doing all that they should be. Jesus said, if anyone wants to come after me, let him deny himself, take up his cross and follow me. Diotrephes forgot the deny self part. For him, it was all about self. He loved praised. He loved being in charge. When it didn’t come to him naturally, he took it by force. Pressure, intimidation and manipulation are the common ingredients found in a mess like Diotrephes. He is only good at showing the bad way to be a Christian. His tongue and wicked ways will drive off many families. Churches split because of people who act this same way. This is not the way the Lord acted. This is not the way God wants his people to behave. Diotrephes simply doesn’t get it. And in some cases, they may never get it.

2. There is only one “first” in the kingdom and that position is taken by Jesus. The rest of us are servants. Jealously and envy have a way of making us forget these things. No one runs the church, but Jesus. No one is in charge of the church other than Jesus. There is no “rising to the top” or “climbing the ranks” within the church. The body has but one head, and that is Jesus. We make artificial pecking orders that that Bible does not. We tend to think of regular members as the lowest, then comes deacons, next elders and at the top are the preachers. We get this idea because of the way we talk and treat one another. All of us are on the same level playing field. We are all equally in this together. The preacher is a member just like everyone else and needs everyone else. The most important person in the church is Jesus. When we forget this, the spirit of Diotrephes rises up within us and look out, trouble soon happens.

3. How we treat each other is as important as what is preached. Somehow, some think it’s ok to be rude, unkind, selfish and must plain mean to one another. This stuff causes more people to leave than what is preached. The church is family. Like your family, you don’t get to pick out who your parents are nor your brothers and sisters. You just have them. For some, they couldn’t have chosen better. For others, they are a real pain. It’s like that in the church. We don’t pick who will become a member, God does. If they are in God’s family, then we need to love them, accept them and encourage them. That’s hard for some of us. We have our select few that we like and the rest, well, if Diotrephes was around, we’d hold the door open as he ran them off. Can’t do that. We’re not even supposed to think that way! But we do. The Jews and Gentiles had to get along. Slaves and masters, when both became Christians, that was most unusual. It’s the same today. We must learn to love and accept our family in Christ.

  Diotrephes loved to show some the door. The one who needs it is Satan. Get him out of our church and our hearts and things would be much better. Work at this. Learn from this.

Roger