Jump Start # 2968

1 Thessalonians 5:18 “In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

Thanksgiving is upon us. It’s a busy time for many families. Some travel. Some host. Food, football, fun and family—that’s part of the plans for so many. Yet, in many homes, Thanksgiving is stressful, tense and not something that some look forward to.

Here are a couple of reasons for that:

First, in many homes, someone is missing this Thanksgiving. There has been a funeral this past year and a spouse, a parent, a grandparent, a child is not there to enjoy the happiness of the times. This is true in my family. This will be a Thanksgiving without my dad. Even when we lived away and couldn’t make it back, I always talked to him on Thanksgiving day. Not this year. He is on the other side having gone through that door of death. And, for some, instead of smiles and laughter, it will be a period of tears and sorrow. There may be some who even feel that it is difficult to be thankful.

Instead of mourning what you don’t have, be thankful for what you did have. The memories. The love. The joy, the special times. There is much to be thankful for. Your example will help others who may not have the courage and faith as you do.

Second, family gatherings can be stressful because of the dysfunction that thrives in so many homes. Comparisons. Jealousy. Favoritism. Mix all of that together and you have one stressful meal. Some homes need a lot of forgiving, but that doesn’t happen. Some homes won’t move past mistakes in the past. Some homes are missing love, respect and decency. So, ‘home for the holidays,’ is not a warm, fuzzy feeling for some. You might be the one who is the peacemaker in such a mess. You might be the one who blazes the trail for forgiveness and grace. Others may not join in. You might be the center of verbal attacks, but you know what the Lord would want you to do.

Third, for the righteous, coming home often puts one in difficult settings. Within the family are those who have divorced and remarried many times. There is one who is homosexual. There is one who openly drinks alcohol and wants everyone to join him, even the little ones. There is one who is living with her boyfriend. There is one who is proud to be an atheist and he loves to ridicule religion. There is one who is neglecting his kids. There is one who spends money recklessly and has no regard for the future. There is one who is always dropping names. There is one who fell away from the Lord and has a nasty attitude about the church. There is one brings his slobbering dogs. There is one who burps at the table. There is one who shows off all the latest things purchased. There is one who has to out do everyone else’s story. There is one who thinks their kids are the brightest and the best. There is one who rarely bathes. There is one who is always late and everyone is forever waiting on that person. There is the one who loves to talk about politics. There is one who hates politics. There is one who if you don’t like his favorite team, won’t let you go without a verbal dressing down. There is the one who is always sarcastic. There is the one who cusses, even in front of the kids. There is one who shows up dressed immodest. There is one who wants to smoke, even at the table. There is one who always cheats when games are played. There is one who lies and laughs about it. There is one who sticks their finger in the dip and licks it off and then does it again, with that same finger. There is the one who flaunts breaking the rules. There is the one who just got released from prison. There is the one who can’t keep a job. There is the one who is always asking you for a favor and some money.

Did I get them all? Uncomfortable, uncomfortable, uncomfortable. And, you leave with a headache and a promise that you’ll never do that again. But you do. Every year you go through the same misery. It’s not fun. It’s not something you look forward to. You wonder why you have to be a part of such a messed up family. But consider, maybe God has placed you right there to be a light into the world. Maybe through you, one or more will see that there is a better way to live.

How does one survive a messy situation like that? First, don’t go in with a dog fight mentality. You don’t have to ‘fix’ everyone nor solve every problem. Most don’t want to be fixed and some problems you can’t solve. Second, pray, pray, pray. Third, look for goodness, kindness and be thankful for that. Fourth, stand your ground where you have to. Protect your kids. You can do this with kindness. You can do this without raising your voice. Finally, don’t carry an “I am better than you are” attitude with you. They will shoot you down for that. There are buttons some love to push. There are topics that some love to stir people up with. You do not have to attend every argument you are invited to and respond to every opinion expressed. As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord—remember that. Do that.

In everything be thankful. That “everything” part is hard. Sometimes we don’t see anything to be thankful for. Look around. Look deep. It’s there.

You’ll get through this and you’ll do fine. Rather than dreading it, you are entering a mission field. Think about the good you can do.

Roger

Jump Start # 2457

1 Thessalonians 5:18 “In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

His name was Trevor. When I knew him he was a teenager. He did something that I have never seen done before. And, he didn’t do it just once, but often. During worship, he would help pass communion and then then the collection plate. Many of us began our service to God this way. You stand in the aisle, and hand the trays to the person sitting on the end. As the trays come down another end, you take them and pass them on to the next row. It’s not hard, but it is something that is important.

Trevor always added something to this when it was his turn to pass the trays. Like everyone else, he stood in silence as folks remembered their Lord. But when it came to the collection plate, as I handed it to him, he would very quietly whisper, “thank you.” He did that every time. I don’t know if he only did that to me or to everyone. I was never sure if he was thanking me for putting in a check or for just handing him the tray. I always took it that he was thanking me for supporting the work and the kingdom.

In more than four decades of being a Christian, no one, other than Trevor, has ever said “Thank you,” when I handed the collection plate to the server. I must admit, when I helped serve, I never said “Thank you,” to anyone. I just did my job in silence. That’s how most of the guys do it. Just silently serve. But that added, “Thank you,” not loud, not drawing attention, just between me and him, was such a special and pleasant surprise. Now, more than a decade later, I still remember that. I thought of Trevor Sunday. I lost track of him and not sure where he is, but in my heart and in my memory is him saying “thank you,” as I handed the collection plate to him.

Now, from this a couple of thoughts.

First, I wonder if God also feels thankful to us. Heaven doesn’t shout it. But there we are on a Sunday. Our hearts are around the dying Savior and His generous salvation that was extended to even us. We sing praises to the God we love. We open His word and drink deeply into the message. We give because we love. We give because we want these things to continue. We give because it’s the right thing to do. Yes, it’s expected. Yes, we are commanded. But still, I wonder if God is thankful that we are doing these things. I want to think so. I want to think that He is pleased with worship. We could be in bed. We could be doing a thousand other things. Even in the church building, our minds and hearts could be filled with worry, stress and all the activities that we need to get done. But there we are, empty of self and full of the Lord and enjoying every moment. I like to think that God whispers, “Thank you.”

Second, obedience is expected, but it’s still nice to have someone recognize it and even compliment it. The worthy servant is only doing what he is supposed to do, we understand that, but it’s sure nice to have someone appreciate the good song leading, the powerful prayer, the passionate sermon, the folks that came, the people that gave. Response is important part of connecting and communicating. We have company over often. When they leave, my wife almost always will ask me about the food. Did I like it? That is important to her. I do the same with my sermons. There are occasions when no one says anything. Was it helpful? Did it stink? Was it any good? Feedback is important.

Thinking about Trevor made me realize that I need to thank the shepherds more than I do. Yes, they are doing what they are supposed to be doing. We’d complain and fuss if they weren’t. But when they are, too often, we just take it for granted. I need to thank people for coming to Bible classes. Yes, they should do that, but still, letting them know that I appreciate that is valuable. What about the weekly bulletin? If it’s not there, we wonder why. But when it’s there, week after week, do we just take it for granted? What about all the other things that goes on in the congregation, or even in our homes? We have super team of men who run the videos, sound and recording. I have no idea what they do. But because of them, hundreds and hundreds of people listen to our lessons every week. Have I thanked them? And, what about home? Bills paid on time. Yard looks nice. Clothes washed. House is cleaned. Just the things a mom and dad does, but a “thank you,” sure puts a little pep and appreciation in what is being done.

I remember the Sundays when Trevor was going to be helping out with the Lord’s Supper and collection. I always hoped that he would be serving on my side. I wondered each time if he would say it, and he always did. “Thank you,” he’d say. And, I’d just smile.

Our passage says to give thanks in everything…everything. It’s hard to be thankful for tough times, trials or even what we are expected to do and supposed to do. But a teenager many years ago understood this. A simple “Thank you,” sure blessed my heart and I have never forgotten that.

What you do today, may well be remembered years from now by someone else. You may do something so little that you think nothing of it, but for another person, he may never forget it.

Thank you…how simple, yet, how powerful.

Roger

Jump Start # 1982

1 Thessalonians 5:18 “in everything give things for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus”

NOTE: With the Thanksgiving holiday, there will not be a Jump Start tomorrow or Friday. We wish you a wonderful time with your family and a thankful heart that appreciates all that the Lord has done for us.

Thanksgiving is upon us. The grocery stores are packed. The highways are crowded. College students have made their ways back home and there is an excitement in the air about being with family and loved ones. However, for some, the holidays are painful. They are dreaded. Home for the holidays isn’t a warm expression. Troubles in family, dysfunction, prodigals, unwilling to forgive, unable to forget, and mountains of guilt and shame have turned the holiday season into something to be tolerated if necessary, and avoided if possible. The end of the first Home Alone movie shows a father and his grown son coming together after being apart. Olive branches, love, forgiveness, second chances, are not only what God offers us, but it’s the very tools that we have to overcome bitter feelings, separations, and silence. Be the first to extend that open hand of love.

The holidays are also painful for those who have lost loved ones recently. So many memories flood around the holidays. The songs. The movies. The annual traditions. All of these can bring a flood of tears to hearts that have not healed.

Our verse today reminds us to be thankful. In everything give thanks. There are times when we may not feel very thankful. Rather than feeling blessed, we feel cheated. We look around and see all the families and all the happiness and we sit alone, missing someone who was very close to us. It’s hard to be thankful when one doesn’t feel like it.

Here are a few thoughts:

First, don’t isolate yourself from life. Elijah hid in a cave from Jezebel. The text tells us that he was “dwelling” in that cave. That word implies that he was planning on staying there. It was going to be his home. Put a mailbox out front, and rugs on the floor, because he had no intentions of leaving. God told the prophet to leave the cave. Being around others can be awkward, and even painful at the holiday times.

It’s not only awkward for you, but it’s awkward for others around you. No one knows what to say. “Do we talk about it, or not?” What if they bring up the person who has died? Do we switch the subject? It may be awkward, but it sure beats sitting alone and drinking cup after cup of misery. Get out of the house. Be around others. It’s healthy and it’s healing.

Second, tears are ok. You don’t want to drown the holidays with a real crying session, but it’s ok to shed some tears because of the memories and missing the one that is not there. But likewise, it’s ok to smile and laugh again. It’s not being disrespectful of the dead to enjoy the moments with others.

Third, healing takes time. Don’t rush things. There is no fast track to getting back to normal. In some ways, you’ll never be back to normal, because someone important is missing from your life. You’ll have a new normal. Realize that others are in pain as well. While a husband may be missing, it is also someone’s son, likely someone’s dad, even someone’s grandpa. Everyone deals with sorrow and grief differently. Men and women grieve differently. Some seem to move on quickly. Others seem to have stopped. It takes time. Being together shares a common bond.

Fourth, to our passage, count your blessings and be thankful. Rather than focusing upon what is gone from your life, think about the precious times you had together. God has been good to all of us. Be thankful. Be thankful that lives intersected. Be thankful for precious memories. Be thankful for lessons learned. Be thankful for prayers that were answered. Be thankful for grace and forgiveness. Be thankful for Heaven. We can be angry at life and at God or we can be thankful. Our choice. It will shape our attitude and it will color our moods.

As we gather to worship this Sunday, try to remember those who are hurting. Reach out to those who are in pain. Be an encourager. Don’t dare say cruel things such as, “You ought to be over that by now.” Be kind. Be sweet. Be like Jesus. Your actions can help a person heal and lift their hearts.

Be thankful. In everything be thankful. We need to be thankful even when we don’t feel very thankful.

Roger

Jump Start # 1481

1 Thessalonians 5:18 “in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus”

  We are in Thanksgiving week. This is a busy week for many families. For some, there are travel plans. Others will be cooking and cooking and decorating the house. It’s a great time to be with family that we don’t get to spend a lot of time with. Busy schedules and distance often leaves our relationships to phone calls and text messages. Nothing beats seeing one another face to face. Nothing beats the smiles, hugs and laughter of family times.

Immediately following Thanksgiving is the big shopping that is called “Black Friday.” It seems black Friday has already started and it now includes black Thanksgiving. Eat the bird and head to the mall seems to suit some, especially the younger crowd.

This week, we will focus our Jump Starts upon Thankfulness. We hope our thoughts will give you some things to reflect upon and maybe even share with some this holiday season. Our passage today states a simple principle, “in everything give thanks.” Have the spirit of thankfulness. We are told to sing with thankfulness.

There are some basic steps that lead to thankfulness.

First, there is an appreciation for what one has or for what one has received. Most have had that awkward moment when they opened a gift and it was not what they wanted. Worse, they hate the thing given to them and will probably toss it as soon as they can. We come up with the expression, “It’s the thought that counts.” It might be, but we think, “we wish it was the gift that counted.” It’s hard to be thankful when you don’t like what you have. Counting blessings begins with feeling you are blessed. The person who feels cheated in life, doesn’t think he has much to count.

This is where our verse especially takes a unique twist. Paul says “in everything give thanks.” A look at Paul’s life reveals that spirit. When in prison, he was thankful that could glorify the Lord. Paul didn’t view hardships as a sign of God’s displeasure nor frowning upon him.

In everything give thanks. The upside of that expression is easy. The sunshine of life makes it easy to be thankful. Those that have great jobs, loving families, good health, worship with an amazing congregation, the list is long to be thankful for. Life is good, as we say. But others don’t have that. Some are looking for a job. Some have a job, but they don’t like it. The pay is stingy. The conditions are terrible. Some do not have a great relationship with their family. Tension and problems make “home for the holidays” a stressful event to be endured, not one to be longed for. Prodigals in the family. Siblings that haven’t spoken to each other in years. Parents that continue to hand out the guilt. Family times are dysfunctional and problematic. Some do not have the health they once did. On a good day, they don’t feel very well. They hurt. They can’t move very fast. They don’t feel like eating. Some do not worship in healthy congregations. Some churches are falling apart. The leadership is clueless. The preacher hammers and hammers and berates the audience. The church is dying and no one seems to care. For many people, life has many problems. It is here that the “in everything give thanks” becomes a challenge. It’s hard to be thankful when we are in situations that are not good.

In everything…that’s hard. That’s something we don’t give a lot of thought to. The “in everything” can be defined as only the good things, but I doubt the apostle meant that. In everything means in everything.

I know a family who has a loved one that who is very seriously ill in the hospital. He’s in critical care. It’s touch and go for them. I know a friend who just found out that he has cancer. I know several families that will be having their first thanksgiving without a husband or dad present. That will be tough. There will be many tears that day. In everything…

Is the apostle implying that my friend ought to be thankful that he has cancer? That sounds morbid. Should a family be thankful that there is an empty chair at the table this year? That doesn’t sound right. What is meant by “in everything…”?

First, even in the darkest storms there are blessings to be found. When the disciples thought that they were going to die, they found a blessing, a sleeping Jesus was with them. They woke Him up and He calmed the storm. There are blessings even in storms. The storms are not what we are thankful for, but what the storms teach us, where they lead us, how they open our eyes are some things to be thankful for.

Second, for the child of God, there is that grand expectation and hope of Heaven someday. All these problems will end with this life. Failing health, stinky churches, dysfunctional families, terrible jobs, all these problems stay on this side of eternity. Where we are going, the problems won’t come with us. No feeling bad in Heaven. No guilt in Heaven. No stress in Heaven. No matter how dark the night becomes, we know day is soon to follow. In everything be thankful. Be thankful that the Lord knows and cares. Be thankful, that through the Scriptures there is help. Be thankful that Heaven won’t be like here.

Third, thankfulness colors the lens of life for us. Some can smile in the midst of a rainstorm. Some are hopeful and optimistic. Those folks are generally thankful. The thankful person has taken his eyes off of himself and he looks to others. He helps where he can. He sees the great love that others have shared with him. He sees how God has touched his life. The more selfish a person is, the less thankful he is. That person tends to feel cheated and is grumpy and likes to rain on everyone else’s parade. He is miserable and wants to share his misery with you. The thankful person brings sunshine to any room or any day. He’s pleasant, joyful and fun to be around. He sees things that others tend to miss.

In everything be thankful. That’s our thought for today. It’s tough if you are having a rough day. Some will have to work on Thanksgiving. That’s a bummer. Or, “in everything be thankful.”

Look around. Look at people. Look at what you have. Look at how far you’ve come. Look at who loves you. And don’t forget to look up. God is someone to be thankful for. He loves you. He thinks about you. He blesses you. He forgives you. He wants you to spend forever with Him in His house. That’s amazing!

In everything…now that’s something to chew on for a while.

Roger