Jump Start # 1258

Psalms 44:24-25 “Why do You hide Your face and forget our affliction and our oppression? For our soul has sunk down into the dust; our body cleaves to the earth.”

  One of the hardest things to do in life is try to explain the “why’s” of life’s ugly side. Parents have to do this when their child’s beloved pet dies. With adults, the explanation is harder to find. A friend in Kansas City, a young man who himself has had many trials and is confined to a wheel chair lost his mother just three weeks ago. She was a godly person. I remember having Bible studies with her in her home. Her passing was tough. Now, just three weeks later, this young man attended the funeral of his best friend. One, like himself, who was in a wheel chair. They were always together. A mother and a best friend within a month.

There is a technical side that I understand. Their deaths were not related. Death happens. It is the curse of this world. Verses will support and teach those facts. We do this in Bible classes. Our sermons are based this way. But something is missing. At the end of the day, a broken and lonely heart doesn’t need principles and facts, it needs comfort.

When Paul wrote the Thessalonians about the death of their loved ones, God must have had this in mind. They were grieving. Their hearts were broken. After Paul explained that they were with the Lord, the section ends with, “comfort one another with these words.” Sometimes, often times, it’s not answers, but comfort that a person needs. We need that fuzzy blanket from Heaven to wrap ourselves up in.

Our passage tugs on the emotional strain that many feel. My friend in Kansas City isn’t the only one. There are some families that never got together this holiday season. Words were said years ago, feelings were hurt, and distance and separation has taken place. For others, there was an empty chair at the holidays because of death. The pain of life can lead one to think that God has deserted them and that they are abandoned in life. This passage from Psalms is directed that way. The sons of Korah are thought to be the writers of this chapter. They had a faith in God, especially from their parents. However, they were being oppressed. Things were going bad for them. They sought God. They prayed. Things didn’t get better. It began to chip away at their faith. In a very raw, real and emotional expression, they felt that God was hiding from them on purpose. Their pain didn’t end. They wanted comfort.

Cheap theology tells us simply to trust in God and everything will just get better. It might. It might get worse. Standing in Job’s shoes reminds us that pain can be very real. The emotional pain can be the greatest. No matter how much we pray, a person who has died is not coming back. No matter how much we loved them, need them, want them, they are not coming back. That hole in our heart is very hard to heal.

So what do we say, first to ourselves and to others when they stand where this passage is? What do we say to someone who feels that God has turned His face from them?

First, the amount of pain and sorrow is not an indicator of God’s satisfaction with us. If that were true, Job would have been one that God must have hated. He didn’t. It was just the opposite. God loved Job. God was bragging about Job. There was no one like Job in God’s book. Health, happiness and friends can be a false illusion. Those are not indicators of things going right in one’s life. Faith, character, hope, obedience and trust—those are the mileposts of doing well with God. We pray more when we hurt. We seek God more when we are alone. Spiritually speaking, hard times can be the best times spiritually. It’s hard to see that when you are knee deep in pain.

Second, as the hymn we sing, “Yes, He cares. I know He cares. His heart is touched with our grief.” No parent likes to see their child crying. God doesn’t either. He sees and He knows how a death will affect those who remain. God knows. Our sorrows tug on His heart. He hasn’t turned His face. He hasn’t walked away.

Third, there are some things that we just can’t answer “Why?” We want to know. Why now? Why this person? Some things are simply beyond us. Those things belong to God. Not knowing why can bug us and bother us, but we must accept that fact that we don’t always know why. God is good. We must trust Him.

Fourth, it is times like this that the people of God shine the brightest. It is time to rally and comfort the wounded heart. This is hard. Too many feel like that they must be professors who know the answer to all things. They generally make things worse. Comfort often doesn’t bring answers. It’s knowing that there are others who love, support and are there for you. In the movie, “It’s a wonderful life,” George Bailey, in trouble and without answers, feels that death is his only solution. The movie ends with tons of people coming to his aid and support. He had friends that he never realized. They were there for him. This is what the people of God need to do when one is hurting. Bring the food. Send the cards. Reach out. Connect. Hug. Be there. Nothing says you care more than presence. You gave up your time to be there.

A gentle reminder, after the funeral, after the food has been eaten, after the cards stop coming, everyone else returns to normal. There is no normal for the one who has lost a mate or a parent. Things are different. Remember that the next month. And the month after that. Recovery is a process. It takes people different amounts of time.

Fifth, the truly greatest help is God. Faith, convictions, and Biblical truth plows through the mountain of sorrow and grief. Someday, there will be no more death, crying or mourning. Someday, all these things that plague us, bother us and upset us will be gone. Someday, if we walk in righteousness, we will be with the Lord.

Why is it that some people have so much and others don’t? I can’t answer that. Why is it that some seem to get smacked over and over with bad news, hard luck and misfortunes? I can’t answer that. Why is it that some simply cannot get more than a step away from bad news? I can’t answer that.

What I can do is extend a hug. What I can do is let them talk. What I can do is let them know that they can count on me. What I can do is be there for them. What I can is what I’d want someone to do for me when it’s my turn. I can do those things.

Can you?  The “why’s of life,” are hard to deal with. We don’t know the answers often, but we do know someone who does, and that is God. Trust Him. He is good, even when things haven’t been good to us. He loves you, even when you cry yourself to sleep at night. He is there for you, even though you feel alone.

God is. He told Moses that His name is “I AM.” It’s not, I was. Nor is it, I will be. But rather, I AM. I am there for you. I am the one who will never let you down. I am one you can trust. I am the one who wants you to go to Heaven.

I AM…

Matthew, I hope these words help. You are loved, by me, but especially by God.

Roger