02

Jump Start # 2339

Jump Start # 2339

Philemon 9 “yet for love’s sake I rather appeal to you– since I am such a person as Paul the aged, and now also a prisoner of Christ Jesus.”

 

Paul the aged, that’s how Paul described himself. That doesn’t fit well in our thinking today. We do everything we can to hide the looks of aging. Ours is a youthful society and when you are no longer youthful you find out that you may not fit in, be needed or are useful. The images of sitting in a wheel chair in a smelly nursing home frightens most of us.

 

Recently I had a discussion with a few different preachers who are in their sixties or more. I’m among them now. The topic was how brethren take care of older preachers. The discussion wasn’t much better than the image of the wheel chair in a smelly nursing home. This is something that many have not given much thought to. I even mentioned this from the pulpit recently in a place I was holding a meeting. The local preacher is in his 70’s. It’s time for conversations, I said, about what to do with our aging preachers.

 

Here are some things I see. Many of these older preachers were never paid much. Some weren’t very good at finances. They are at a point in life where they must preach because they need the income. Also, many are not able to keep up with technology and fast paced, large congregations. They are simply left behind and often the only places that will have them are small, struggling congregations that cannot afford anyone else. Many of these grand old soldiers have preached for more than fifty years of their life. And, they see reality. Congregations want these younger fireballs. Like the old work mule, they are worn out and replaced and never used, nor thought of again. A few of the best are still used, but for the most part, you never hear of these old giants anymore. They move slowly. Some look fragile. They struggle with computers, powerpoint and they do not understand social media. Yet, they have a wealth of Biblical knowledge. They have tons of experience. They have been through spiritual battles and wars and have come out on the other side. But now, they are old. They stand with Paul the aged.

 

What are we to do with the old preachers? Here are some thoughts:

 

First, find ways to use these old soldiers of Christ. They may not be able to keep the pace of a fast moving congregation, but they can teach. Let them teach. Many can still write. Let them write. Many have years of great class material. Dig them out, put a fresh face on them and use them.

 

Second, companies learned a long time ago that simply paying a daily or weekly wage wasn’t enough. They started pensions and retirement programs. Through the years that progressed to 401’s that companies added to as well as the worker. It’s time for the church to start thinking that way. What better way to honor and older servant of Christ than promising to take care of him the rest of his life. A church has to be forward thinking with this and making plans, but it can be done. Simply replacing a man after fifty or sixty years of service seems rather cold and heartless.

 

Third, help the younger preachers learn about finances and retirement. Put things in his salary that will be exclusively used for retirement. Try to prevent the situation of someone having to preach late in life because he is broke. Include life insurance with the package for the preacher. This helps his wife in the case that he passes. I’ve known several preachers who died and they had no life insurance. Shame on them for not being better stewards. In one situation, the preacher and his wife lived in a house that was owned by the church. A month after his death, the elders showed up and told the widow that she had to move out because a new preacher was hired. She had nothing. It was a pitiful situation. Talk about these things and be transparent in what is needed.

 

Fourth, as the preacher ages, there may be areas that he is better suited for beyond the daily tasks of a local work. Maybe he wants to preach on the road more. Maybe he wants to focus upon overseas work. Find what excites him and he is good at and work with him. Use him and his wisdom to better the kingdom.

 

Fifth, find ways to honor the old servant of Christ. In many ways, the old preacher feels like life has passed him. What the younger people talk about, he doesn’t understand. He feels out of touch. He often feels no longer needed. I know this because I have talked to some of these men. With real tears in their eyes, they confess that they never thought their careers would end this way. Forgotten. Unwanted. Put out to pasture. I know a couple of congregations that periodically brings in these older preachers. They make it a special deal. These grand old voices aren’t cranky, critical, or judgmental. They have a special way of reminding us of Biblical promises and truths that we have long forgotten.

 

Finally, there comes a time when age, the ability to connect, and health issues finally forces the old preacher to retire. It’s hard on him. For more than half a century he has been preaching every Sunday. The congregation as well as the preacher who replaces him must never throw the old preacher under the bus. The old preacher often wonders if he has done any good. He has simply tried to bring Christ before the eyes of the people throughout his life. Be kind in this transition. Be helpful to the old preacher. Most that I know are humble and want to get out of the way. They don’t want to be the focus of any attention and they don’t want to hinder the work of the Lord. They would rather just fade out quietly, and for most, that is what will happen to them.

 

What to do with an old preacher? Have you ever discussed that? Do you have any plans? Have you given him any assurances or hope? While many of us enjoy retirement, for the old preacher, it is often a silent struggle with finances, emotions, self-esteem and wondering what value he is to others.

 

I believe it’s time we gave some serious thought and had some real conversation about what to do with an old preacher. I hope this helps. I hope some changes begin to take place.

 

Roger

 

01

Jump Start # 2338

Jump Start # 2338

Ephesians 5:23 “For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.”

 

Yesterday, we looked at dating and marriage. We continue going down that path, by focusing upon “headship.” The husband is the head of the wife. That sentence doesn’t set well with some folks. It’s not correct in our culture of changing roles, changing genders and everyone struggling to be at the top.

 

The husband is the head. That statement has gone to the head of some men. For some, it means that they get their selfish way, regardless of what is in the best interests of the family. They get to call all the shots. They shout and everyone must come running. In extreme cases, some like bossing others without doing anything themselves. It is that controlling spirit that has caused some to rebel and want to break free. It fuels mutinies. And, most of all it’s not Biblical, kind, nor constructive to building a strong relationship with the one we are married to.

 

I’ve heard men all but pound their chests in a Bible class, proudly declaring that the man is the head of the home. And, far too many wives shrivel in fear of this image that is out of control and hurtful. Shame on any of us men for thinking this way. It doesn’t mean that you eat first. It doesn’t mean that you go to the head of the line first. It doesn’t mean that you control the remote every evening. And, whenever a man has to remind his wife that “I am the head,” he’s already lost the understanding and nature of what is being discussed. It’s no wonder that feminism flies so high among some these days.

 

The passage states, “For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church.” It’s that “as Christ also,” part that most seem to forget about. Yes, the husband is the head, but his model must be that of Christ. And, just how is Christ the head of the church?

 

Jesus gave Himself for the church. Jesus sacrificed. Jesus came to serve and not be served. Jesus never asks us to do something that He didn’t first do Himself. Those who are walking by faith, do not feel controlled, dominated nor as if they were slaves because of the way Jesus treats us. Instead, we feel loved. We feel thankful. We have tasted of His grace. We know His kindness. We worship, not because we have to, but rather, because we want to. We follow, we obey, we trust, not because there is a divine hand that may strike us from Heaven. We do these things because we are treated better than we deserve. God is good to us. He never asks the impossible. He never crushes our spirit. He is there for us. When we let Him down, He comes looking for us. He forgives us time and time again. That’s Jesus. That’s our Lord. He is the head and we would never want that position. We would mess things up. His mercy. His love. His patience. His generosity. All of us can speak of those things.

 

Now, the husband is the head of the wife. Barking orders for ice tea? Nope. Grabbing the remote out of her hand? Never. His role is to make his wife feel loved, appreciated, wanted, and special. She feels thankful to have him in her life. He does things with her in mind. He will watch shows that he probably hates, but he will do that because it’s special to her. He may eat at places he would never do by himself. But he will, because it means so much to her. He will be patient with her. He will forgive her. He will help her be the best that she can. Every decision is made with her in mind. Even weekends, he will sacrifice doing what he’d like, so that together they can do things together. Jesus gave His all for us. That’s the shadow we husbands must stand in.

 

And, in the grandest of fashions, he will help her walk with the Lord. He will lead her to Heaven. When he doesn’t feel like going to worship, he will. He will because it’s the right thing to do, and that’s what leaders do. When she wants to have folks over, he will agree, even though he’d rather stay home and watch a game on TV. He will help her clean the place up. He will help her with the sweeping, the dishes and the cooking. This is important to her and it’s the right thing to do, so he will do it. He will hold her hand as they pray together before they eat. When there are things that he does that upsets her and bothers her, he will change his ways. He won’t fuss and dig his heels in, because he knows how important these things are to her. He will get the finances in order so that when he is no longer here, she will be taken care of. He will live in such a way, whether at work, with his friends, or, at church, that she is proud of him. His focus is upon her. And, by being honest, respectful and devoted, she trusts him and knows that he’d never do anything to hurt her or the family. He’d rather fall on the sword himself than to see his family harmed. He brings about goodness. He compliments. He is kind. He is thoughtful. He stands in the shadows of Jesus.

 

And, linking these thoughts to yesterday’s Jump Start, how critical and essential it is that our young men understand their role. They are mini shepherds, just like the ones at church. Their job is to lead the family to Heaven. It’s not enough that the bills are paid and that there is food on the table. He is leading the family in right thinking. He is showing the family the heart of a servant as he helps others. He is leading the way by being the first to forgive. Sometimes leaders must make the tough call. Sometimes leaders get criticized. Sometimes leaders must draw a line in the sand and have a “come to Jesus” conversation with the family. This is the role of the male. Get that family to Heaven. Just as we would point fingers to any shepherds that would allow false teaching to take over a church, the same goes with the family and the fingers point to the husband. I’ve seen many prom pictures on Facebook. What some of these girls are wearing is shocking. Where’s the dads in all of this? The same goes for wedding dresses. God doesn’t give us a pass on modesty because it’s a special occasion. A person can dress beautifully and still be modest. Who is buying these clothes for these girls? Where is the godly leadership? An immodest girl dancing with a young man whose hormones are exploding is a disaster about to happen. Someone isn’t doing their job. There seems to be no headship here. There seems to be no guiding principles pointing to Heaven. There seems to be missing a reminder of who we are. Who ought to be the one reminding, the dad.

 

Now, on the other side, if our daughters are marrying men who are not godly, spiritual and leaders, who is going to head that home? It’s a ship with no one at the helm. Who will lead the family to worship? Who will set the example that God wants? Who will draw a line with God and say “no,” when that needs to be said? Oh, he may have a great job. He may be nice and make your daughter laugh, but is he a godly person that you want to give the keys to your daughters heart? Do you want him guiding her spiritually, emotionally and mentally? Wil she be better off spiritually because of him?

 

This is why dating and marrying Philistines, like Samson did, isn’t wise spiritually. The head of the home needs to know how to get to Heaven. If he doesn’t, how will he lead them there? Headship is about leading. Our physical heads make the decisions that the rest of our bodies follow. If the decisions are selfish, immature, ungodly, what will the outcome be?

 

These are the kinds of conversations that need to take place in our homes and in our teen studies. It’s more than marrying someone from the church. It’s marrying someone that I can trust to help me get to Heaven. There are only a few select people that know my passwords. I wouldn’t give them to anyone. Yet, are we willing to leave the hearts of our children to be lead by people who do not know the Lord? Do you trust their spiritual decisions? Do they even think spiritually at all?

 

Heading home to God, that’s the proper concept of leading the family. That task falls upon the man. He can do this with God’s help. He will do this if he walks with God. If he doesn’t, who knows where he may end up, and is that what you want your children to be following? Read Ezekiel 34:4. That’s the outcome when shepherds do not shepherd. That’s the outcome when a family has no godly leadership.

 

Roger