Jump Start # 1827

1 Peter 4:9 “Be hospitable to one another without complaint.”

One would think that this verse wouldn’t be necessary, but God felt otherwise. It’s like a mother telling her child to be nice at a birthday party. The joy and the good that comes from hospitality is ruined by a complaining spirit. Good can be ruined because our hearts are not in the right place. Paul illustrated this in the Corinthian letter when he said “If I give all my possessions to feed the poor…but do not have love, it profits me nothing.” There was a two sided good in that. The poor got a meal. That helped them. The other side, was supposed to profit Paul. The good deed was honorable. It was storing treasures in Heaven. It was letting your light shine. All of that, was ruined because it was done without love.

We see the same in other areas. The good of teaching a Bible class can be ruined because someone feels compelled to teach when no one else stepped up. The children will still learn, but the good that could come to the teacher is lost.

The same can happen to someone who serves as a deacon or even a shepherd. They are helping others, but if their heart is not into it, the sacrifice, the time and the service is truly lost because of their attitude.

The same can be said of preaching. The good of sharing the gospel can be lost because the preacher’s attitude isn’t where it ought to be. He complains about how pitiful he is paid or how small a crowd is, rather than the honest and good hearts that he may be shaping through the Gospel of Christ.

Attitude is just as important as the good that is done. The heart of a servant, serves. Otherwise, he feels like a slave. He feels like he is doing something that he is forced to do, that’s slavery. Peter nails the most common attitude issue in our verse today. We complain. We complain about having to do hospitality. We complain about having to teach. We complain about having to serve as an elder or deacon. We complain about having to preach. Usually, it’s the family that hears the complaints. We can put on a good face, smile and fake our way through what we are doing, but before, and after, it’s complaining time.

I’ve been there. You’re tired and you just want to go home and chill out with a TV show. Nothing wrong with that, except the wife has invited some folks over. That means no TV show. That means the house has to be picked up. She cooks while I dust and sweep, groaning on the inside. It’s too late to cancel. It would look terrible. So, you muster through it. What I have found is that sour, “Do we have to,” spirit changes. Once the people arrive and a meal is shared and fun and fellowship take place, it’s great. It certainly beats watching a TV show. And after the people leave, there’s the clean up. Trash has to be taken out. Dishes washed. If there were kids, toys have to be put back away. As you do all of this, your thoughts are swirling around about the wonderful conversations you have engaged in. Great people. You learned things. You shared things. And to think, had you had your way, you would have sat watching some dumb TV show. Been there.

I think the complaints, whether with hospitality, teaching, leading or even preaching, comes from that inner struggle of being a servant and not fully denying ourselves. What we want often rises up. Why should I, is spoken not from the heart of a servant, but from one who is thinking about self. Why don’t others, is the same thing.

The other problem with complaints is that it distorts things to those who hear your complaints. An older preacher complaining to a younger preacher, can ruin the image and expectations of a young preacher. Elders who complain, without realizing it, often cause men to run away from being the next elders. Why should they? Listen to what the current elders say in private. Kids grow up hearing their parents constantly complaining about hospitality will probably steer clear of inviting others into their homes. They have heard all the horror stories. Complaints can distort the image, ruin the good and be a negative example for others.

Service is just that, it’s service. It’s work. It’s cleaning. It’s teaching. It’s shepherding. It’s preaching. If not careful, the complainers want the glory of serving without the sweat and hard work that comes with it. To be a servant of Christ, means to serve. The Martha syndrome comes in when we know others who could do the same but they are sitting. That was Martha’s problem. It wasn’t that she was serving. Later on in the Gospels she is found serving again. What bothered her was Mary. Mary was doing nothing. Martha was doing it all. One can imagine the stares that Martha gave toward Mary. I expect she may have banged a few pans louder than normal to get Mary’s attention. She may have sighed so everyone could hear her. When nothing was working, she finally interrupted Jesus. How embarrassing! She then told Jesus, to tell her sister to help me. Can you imagine! She told Jesus what to do? Martha had complaints. The good of serving was lost because she burnt her own attitude. The Lord did not come to Martha’s defense. He said “you are worried and bothered about so many things. Only one thing is necessary.” Some have taken that to mean, sitting at Jesus feet is the only thing necessary. Others think that Martha was making too big of a meal. Just make one thing. You are over working. You are doing too much.

I have seen modern Marthas. As a preacher on the road, I get invited into many homes for a meal. I have seen, more than once, that the wife missed worship services because she was home cooking the meal. Don’t do that. Martha, Martha.

Martha’s problem was not serving alone. She was getting it done. She was bothered by what another person was not doing. Oh, we do the same. “Why do I always have to teach?” “Why can’t others teach?” Martha! “Why do they want me to be an elder? Are there others who can serve?” Martha! “Why is it always the same folks who show up for a work day?” Martha! Bothered by what others do is a cause of many complaints.

Just serve. Do what you can do. Keep your complaints to yourself. Be thankful that you can help out in the kingdom. Don’t ruin your good by having a sour attitude. Instead of looking what others are not doing, see what more that you can do. Don’t worry about others. Put a smile on your face, roll up your sleeves and get to it. You are making a difference, and Heaven notices.

Jesus said, “Whoever in the name of a disciple gives to one of these little ones even a cup of cold water to drink, truly I say to you he shall not lose his reward” (Mt 10:42). Don’t ruin this by complaining that you have to wash the cup after the person drank from it. Don’t ruin it by saying why didn’t others do this. Just do it. Do it with a smile. Do it for the Lord!

Serving without complaining—we gotta work on that!

Roger