31

Jump Start # 1819

Posted on March 31, 2017 by Jump Starts Daily in Jump Starts Daily | Tagged | Leave a comment

Jump Start # 1819

Psalms 133:1 “Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together in unity!”

 

Unity—the ability to get along, blend together, work together and be one is a huge aspect of the N.T. church. We find expressions such as “one mind,” “one voice,” “striving together,” as essential elements that made the church functional and practical. The Ephesians were told to “be diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit.” Getting along isn’t easy. It isn’t easy at home. It isn’t easy in a nation and it isn’t easy in a congregation.

 

The N.T. shows the strains and the difficulties of unity. Jews and Gentiles blending together created some unique issues that had to be worked though and thought out. Differences such as eating meats sacrificed to idols tested this unity. Some didn’t do well with this unity. The Galatians were warned about “biting and devouring one another.” Diotrephes refused to accept some brethren that were sent from the apostle John. He put them out. The Corinthians were divided and splintered in many areas. It affected the worship, specifically the Lord’s Supper and it drove some to lawsuits against each other.

 

Getting along is hard. Take a long road trip with the kids and you’ll find this out. It’s a challenge today to get believers to be one. Everyone has their own thoughts about how things ought to be done. We recently went through three huge unity testers where I worship. We added on to the building. We changed the order of worship. We hired a new preacher. Everyone has thoughts about each of those. It’s hard for a husband and wife to agree on what color to paint the walls at home. Imagine trying to set the course with 400 people involved. You will never please everyone. However, unity can still prevail.

 

Here are some things I have learned about unity:

 

First, unity begins with an attitude and a spirit that wants to be together. Take a kid and send him to summer camp, and if that kid goes kicking and screaming and has his mind made up that he won’t like it, there is a strong chance that we won’t like it. But talk it up. Send some friends with him. Get his attitude changed and the results will change. “I don’t like it,” works well if you live by yourself in an apartment. But if you want to do anything with someone else, you have to learn to get along. This is learned in dating. This is the key to marriage. I’ve watched many shows with my wife that I would never watch by myself. My wife wanted to watch them and I wanted to sit by her, so I watched them. In fact, I not only learned some things, they weren’t all that bad. In fact, I grew to like some of her shows. That’s what the spirit of unity will do to a person. If your mind is made up that I don’t like something down at church, you probably won’t like it. But if you have the spirit that says, “I want to sit with others,” you may grow to like things.

 

Second, the very nature of the word unity implies and means getting along with others. If everyone did what I want to do, there is no unity, they are doing what I want. Unity is about getting along. This is lacking in our times today. Society demands, you must accept me, but I don’t have to accept you. That’s nothing more than selfishness. That will always blow up and it will always fail. It kills a marriage. It destroys friendships. It severs a church. Get along. It may not be my idea, but if it’s not wrong, why can’t I give it a try? What hurts many churches today is that there are too many of us who are selfish and we have to have our way or we pitch a fit. The expression, “I’ll take the ball and go home,” is exactly how some feel and behave. Why should you always have your way? Why should I always have my way? When dealing with things down at the church house, two things must come first in our thinking.

 

(1) Is it right with the Lord. Unity around error is wrong. Everyone wanting a golden calf doesn’t mean golden calves are right. The Lord has to be thought of first. Is it Biblical? Is this consistent with the Scriptures? Is this what we are supposed to be doing? That must be the first thought every time.

 

(2) Next, what’s best for the group. When you are trying to unify a group, the group as a whole must be thought about. Where are they spiritually? What is best for them spiritually? What will help them the most? This is what works at home. Maybe dad feels like going golfing on Saturday, his day off. Sounds like fun. But for the group, the family, it may be best to take the kids to the park. Dad may not feel like going to the park, but it’s not about him. It’s what’s best for the group.

 

Third, unity moves beyond attitudes and a spirit, to actually participating together. It’s one thing to say, “I’ll go along with it,” but then you never show up or you never are involved with things. On our Saturday illustration. Dad could send mom and the kids to the park and he goes golfing. Everyone does what they want and all is happy, except, there was not togetherness with dad. He didn’t participate with the family. He did what he wanted to do. When the kids are older and it’s time to visit grandma, they may remember that. They may say, “You go. We don’t feel like it.” Cooperating. Participating. Engaged. Being there. Being there when the church has special meetings and classes. Being there because the shepherds have designed something that will help us. Being there, because unity demands that. Unity is more than an attitude. It’s doing things together. It’s being together.

 

Fourth, unity is based upon decisions made by trusted shepherds or elders. Men who truly have their heart set on helping the church have a track record of making important decisions that will benefit all of us. Their history has proven this. They have not done things without pouring hours and prayers into projects. Now this may be a problem in some places. Maybe the shepherds have not proven themselves. Maybe the members do not trust the shepherds. Maybe that relationship is not healthy and good. If that is the case, then there will be a struggle with unity.

 

Have you ever seen what happens when unity is missing in a church? It’s not a pretty picture. You have subgroups that talk with each other and they talk about the other people. Folks don’t stick around long after services. They peel out as soon as the amen is said. Why stick around, there is nothing in common with each other. That’s the thinking when unity is missing. Activities, projects and special meetings are usually a bust. Few show up. No one supports these things. It’s do the minimum and nothing more. It’s get through worship as fast as we can and get out of there. No one greets others. You can feel the tension. You can tell these people do not like each other. There are constant battles and friction going on under the surface. There are attempts to undermine the leadership and other attempts to take over. It’s ugly, messy and lacking Christ.

 

How pleasant it is, our verse tells us, for brothers to dwell together in unity! It is good. It shows the world that we are different, but Christ binds us together. It shows the world that we can get along. It is powerful. It is strengthening. It is encouraging. It is helpful. It bugs the daylights out of Satan. It is what God wants.

 

So, it comes down to you and me. Do you want to be united? Can we be team players? Can we cooperate? Can we give and take? Does it have to be your way? Does it have to be my way? Can we see how good and pleasant it is when we dwell together? Instead of frowning, let’s smile. Instead of crossing our arms, let’s hug. Instead of sitting alone, let’s sit together. Instead of each going our own way, let’s walk together. Can we talk? Can we listen? Can we be together? Can we share? Can we learn from each other?

 

Unity—it begins with you and me wanting it.

 

Roger

 

30

Jump Start # 1818

Posted on March 30, 2017 by Jump Starts Daily in Jump Starts Daily | Tagged | Leave a comment

Jump Start # 1818

2 Corinthians 12:10 “Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.”

Our verse today comes from the running lists of Paul’s troubles he endured as an apostle. It was a hard road and most of us could not have done what he did. In prisons. Beatings. Stoned. Shipwrecked. In dangers from all sorts of people. He did this because he loved Christ. He did this because God gave him a second chance. He did this because he was appointed to be an apostle. There was no quitting for Paul. He mentions these things because there were those who were challenging his right to say what he was saying. Paul took the time to defend his position. This list comes up as what he has gone through. This wasn’t bragging, it was setting the story straight. He has always put Christ first.

 

Among the words we find here are “difficulties.” Weather, travel, opposition, health—those all fall under the word “difficulties.” Today’s church faces many difficulties. These troubles tax God’s shepherds. It’s hard to know what to do. Some do well with these things and others have not done so well. Let me list three areas I see difficulties:

 

  1. The special ed child. When I was going to school, back with Moses it seems like, no one ever mentioned special ed classes. Teachers were teachers. Today, there are a special classification of teachers called, “special ed” teachers. The special ed child often has attention disorder and needs special help. The challenge that faces many churches today is when a special ed child is placed in a Bible class which is taught by someone who is not a professional teacher, and has had no special ed training. The Bible class teacher, the special ed student and the class often all get frustrated. I am not sure if I know what the best answers are for this situation but I do know many congregations that struggle through this and they do not know what to do.

 

Possibly, it would be helpful for the parents of a special ed child to talk to the shepherds and the Bible class teacher to find positive ways to making this a win-win situation for everyone. What works? Maybe another helper needs to be added to that class to help with the special ed child. If there is a special ed teacher in the congregation, her insights and advice and help would be most useful. Often help is sitting there in the pew but it is not utilized. Don’t fight each other. Work together. Help each other. This is a challenge that many congregations face and they don’t know what to do.

 

  1. The mentally challenged member. There are those who have various mental difficulties and often others do not know what to do with these challenges. Some may dominate a class. Some may speak out during services. I’ve known some congregations that have asked the mentally challenged to go somewhere else. I have known of a situation in which the elders took a person out of a class while it was going on and asked him to leave and never come back. That certainly doesn’t sound like Jesus when we do that! Many of us do not understand, nor have any training in this area. These are difficulties and challenges that many congregations face today. There are so many shades of mental difficulties, from the soldier who returns from war with PTSD, to various kinds of depression, to various compulsive disorders, to various forms of mental illness. Years ago the common solution was to tell the person to have faith. We thought faith was the answer to all these things. We’d give the person a verse and expect that to fix all things. It didn’t. We’d have our preachers preach on it. Still that didn’t always “fix” things. Now we know that there is more to it than just having more faith. It’s hard to understand some of these things. It’s hard to know what to do. Getting advice from experts is good. Reading and studying about these things is important. Knowing what to say and sometimes knowing what not to say is important. There are souls and families involved and it requires lots of love and lots of patience to work together on these things.

 

  1. The addicted. This too, stretches the patience of a congregation. Often the damage and troubles that follows fills the shepherds schedule with meetings, studies and looking for ways to help. The addicted comes in many flavors and none of them are good. Alcohol…drugs…gambling…over spending…pornography. These things kill marriages. They ruin families. Often it’s a phone call that someone has been arrested because of their addiction. Other times, it comes from a tearful spouse who is so tired of dealing with these things that they want out of the marriage. Because of shame, many of the addicted hide in the shadows for years. Sometimes their families help them hide their secret. Too many times, once it becomes known, there has been a serious problem as a result. The job has been lost because of the addiction. The house is being foreclosed because of the addiction. An affair has taken place because of the addiction. Someone is in jail.

 

The simple solution is just to tell the addicted, “Stop doing it.” Many would love to. It’s too late. They are addicted. Preaching about self-control might have helped a while back, but it’s too late. They are addicted. What is the church to do? More and more congregations struggle with these enormous challenges. Professional help many times is necessary. It is important for shepherds and preachers to recognize when situations are above their limits and knowledge. Just “winging-it” on advice can be a waste of time and even make matters worse. For generations we have ignored sending people to get professional help. The thought was faith will solve all things. We now know better. Professional help does not replace faith but there are some things that need trained experts to help a person. What happens when a family can’t afford professional help? That is often the case. The answer is not to abandon them with the conclusion that “we told them to get help.” They would if they could, but they can’t afford it. This is when a congregation and brethren need to step up to help. Isn’t it worth any money spent, if it can save a marriage, turn an addict and save a soul? There are limitations upon what a congregation can use it’s money, but even where it can, some don’t want to. Are we not to help one another as Thessalonians teaches? Do will help the addict?

 

We probably need to do a better job of teaching discipleship when one comes to Christ. Commitment and spirituality and learning to make wise choices is something that we need to teach over and over. Instead of always following the problems with a broom to clean them up, we need to try to prevent problems through a proper teaching of God’s word.

 

There are reasons why people are addicted. There are steps that lead to addictions. There were a series of wrong choices made that brought about that addiction. It is here that congregational teaching can make all the difference. It is here that faith can triumph.

 

Today’s churches face many challenges that some do not want to admit. Keeping our head in the sand is not the right decision about these things. Doing nothing is not the right choice. Just hoping that these people will get “fixed” isn’t the right choice. We are family. We need to act like a family, especially when there are difficult challenges. Learn. Help. Be patient. Love. Be there.

 

I hope this will open the door for some real discussions about these things. Maybe good will result from this. It’s time. In fact, it’s way past time. We face some real challenges and our inability to deal with these difficulties have made some families leave the congregation in tears. There are not quick and easy solutions to difficulties. Lives can get messy and complicated. It can take a long time to untangle these messes and find positive help. Let’s do better.

 

Roger

 

29

Jump Start # 1817

Posted on March 29, 2017 by Jump Starts Daily in Jump Starts Daily | Tagged | Leave a comment

Jump Start # 1817

2 Peter 3:3 “Know this first of all, that in the last days mockers will come with their mocking, following after their own lusts, and saying, ‘where is the promise of His coming? For ever since the fathers fell asleep, all continues just as it was from the beginning of creation.’”

 

One of the hymns we sing, begins with, “Troublesome times are here, filling men’s hearts with fear…” This is nothing new. This is the very thought behind Peter’s words. Trouble is coming. Be ready. Don’t be shocked. It does us well to give some thought to these words.

 

First, Peter says, “Mockers will come.” That alone bothers us. We want God to stop the mockers. Peter says that they will come. This is nothing more than another attack by Satan upon God’s people. Revelation 12 ends with the sober words that the dragon went to wage war against those who hold the testimony of Jesus. So mockers will come. They come in many sizes and in many colors. Some are nothing more than college professors who think that their studies have given them the answers to all things in life. Religion, and specifically, Christianity in it’s purest form, has no place in the thinking man’s world. They will use every opportunity to criticize, blast, and mock followers of Christ. Mockers come in the form of the Hollywood elite. They, too, think that they have great insight into all matters of life. Their words, they feel, need to be heard more than any one else. Mockers are found within our families. The internet is packed full of mockers. They come.

 

Second, the mockers come with their mocking. That seems to be an odd way of stating that. It seems redundant. Mockers certainly are not going to spread the truth. Mockers are not going to praise all things good and right. They mock because they are mockers. Peter is letting the brethren know these things. Don’t be shocked. Don’t be surprised at the ridiculous, inaccurate, and even dumb things that people state. Mockers and their mocking will come.

 

Third, what they say is not right. Their view of history is distorted and wrong. They claim that nothing has changed since creation. Everything has remained the same. Always has been and always will be. They look to the past and falsely assume that’s proof that things will always be the same in the future. Even in their observable world they should know better. Trees die. Rivers change courses. Volcanoes erupt. Landslides change the shape of hills and valleys. Things have not always been the same. Peter reminds them of the flood. He says “it escapes their notice.” Maybe. Maybe they don’t want to believe. By the word of the Lord God created. By the word of the Lord, the floods came and changed the world. And by that same word of the Lord, the present world will be destroyed by fire. The proof is in God’s word.

 

Because things have always been a certain way in the past does not mean that they will always be that way in the future. The source and the proof of their mocking was what they could see with their eyes. Their vision was tainted. They were not seeing things clearly. They had forgotten the word of the Lord.

 

What Peter does here is to answer their inaccurate claims. What they said simply isn’t so. They were wrong. Peter gives proof. His proof is with the word of God. That word, never changes.

 

Don’t be afraid when someone challenges and mocks what you believe. Like the mockers in Peter’s day, what they say is not true. God’s word is always right.

 

Fourth, Peter then uses this occasion to address believers. He said that “it escaped the notice” of the mockers, but later he writes, “do not let this one fact escape your notice…” Don’t be like the mockers. Don’t forget what God said. We stand with mockers when we allow reason and our limited observations to conquer what God’s word says. Stand with God and His word. We know because God said.

 

People like to blow smoke. They say a bunch of stuff without proof. The shallow in faith crumble at such things. Those that stand upon the word of God can see right through it. There is nothing to their claims. Most times, mockers are inconsistent, lacking proof and thriving at being loud and repeating old charges that pokes holes in people’s faith.

 

There are two things this section brings together for the believer.

 

First, know that mockers will come.

Second, know the word of God. Do not let this one fact escape your notice, Peter says.

 

So, this again reminds us that we need to have the word of God in us. Not only will it build our faith, but it will fortify us against those that mock. We know what is right. We know where we stand. We know God.

 

It seems that mockers are miserable. They don’t want faith and they don’t want others to have faith either. They seem to want the world to dwell in the present without any hope, any help and without God. Such a life is sad, without purpose and going no where. Mockers don’t offer a pretty picture. Their world is gloom and doom. Selfishness is the core and goodness won’t survive. The only persuasion of mockers is that the Gospel is wrong so there is no other alternative. There is no attractive nature to the world of mockers. There is no incentive to want to join them. Life isn’t better because of their ways. Life without God is dark and doomed. Death is seen as an pleasant way out of this agony and pain. But they learn too late, that death isn’t the end. They learn that they have believed a lie. They learn that “their gospel” has been false.

 

God is. God remembers His promises. God is good. God’s timetable is not the same as ours. So things continue on for generations. That does not mean God has forgotten His promises. He never does. These same mockers should have studied the prophets. They should have looked at the promises to Abraham. God kept His word. He always does. Mockers thrive because they don’t know nor understand God’s word. They simply don’t get it and as a result they build a whole system against something that they never understood to begin with.

 

I know whom I have believed, are the words of Paul. They ought to be our words as well. We stand upon the word of God. Wolves come who appear to be sheep, but they are not. Satan prowls like a lion. Mockers come. None of these things surprise us. None of these things move us. They will come. They will go. God remains!

 

Roger

 

28

Jump Start # 1816

Posted on March 28, 2017 by Jump Starts Daily in Jump Starts Daily | Tagged | Leave a comment

Jump Start # 1816

John 10:10 “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.”

The abundant life. We just completed a series at my home congregation based upon this passage. It revolved around our theme for the year, “Life, the way it was meant to be.” For a dozen weeks we have looked in detail at just what Christianity looks like. It’s more than just sitting in a church building on Sunday. Everywhere we go, we are Christians. We never turn it off. It is never out of place. It affects our choices. It affects how we use our money. It is seen in what we do for fun. It is illustrated by what we do at home. It changes how we view death.

 

Before the first sin, God made Adam and Eve in the garden. It was called Paradise. They had a rich relationship with the Lord. This was not a place that they found Googling. This was a home, an environment and a world designed specifically for them by God. This is how God wanted it to be. Sin changed all of that. Because of sin, man lost the ideal that God created. Because of sin, man settled for other things. He opted for easier and cheaper alternatives than what God offered. And here we are. Most of us are not living life the way it was meant to be. We are plagued with worry. We are miserable. We complain. We fuss and fight at home, in traffic and at work. We want, but we are not sure what we want. We don’t know contentment. Church services become a form of spiritual spankings to remind us how bad we are. Days quickly turn into weeks, which become months and then years fly by. We are so busy that we don’t have time for meaningful relationships. Our social skills have fallen to a few abbreviated text messages throughout the day.

 

One must wonder, “Is this it?” Or, “Is this as good as it gets?” Are we living as God intended? Jesus not only came to give live, but He came to give it abundantly. Eternal life—living forever, is not found in medical science but in a promise of God. To live, really live, is not to escape responsibilities of life. It is not to live without rules. It’s not to live dangerously or foolishly. It is to live in Christ Jesus. Eternal life is found in Christ. He is the resurrection and the life. I am Life—stated in John 11 and in John 14. Anything other than this, will never be the life that God intended for you to live. To say, “I am a man but God intended for me to be a woman,” is foolish and without any Biblical basis. To say, “God may me Homosexual,” is foolish and without any Biblical basis. Life the way it was meant to be, is never going to be found in ignoring what God says. It’s not gong to be found in living selfishly or indifferently, especially to the Lord.

 

Life, the way it was meant to be, is a life of spiritual choices. It is not settling for the quick and easy. It is seeing the big picture. It is looking at things spiritually. It is reflected in decisions that look at consequences, faith, and eternity. Our choices shape the life that we life.

 

So, we begin with the question that every senior in high school is asked, “What do you want to do after high school?” That’s a tough question for an 18 year-old. Many want to just play video games. They haven’t thought about all those deep things. Making money is high on the list. Make money so I can buy stuff. And so the student is guided into fields that produce money. His passion may not be in those things, but he has been told that’s where the money is. If he can play sports, he’s pushed that direction. College ball. Pro ball. Super star. MVP. Proud dads standing beside these young athletes often signing their names to the devil as a life of ungodliness, immorality and obscene arrogance surrounds the superstar. Where’s God in these decisions? Like Lot, long ago, the fields near Sodom look good. He lost a wife and his daughters made wrong choices. The fields were good for his livestock but terrible for his soul. Peter tells us that Lot’s righteous soul was vexed every day by the things he saw and heard. Will that be your son or daughter in a college dorm? Will their soul be vexed by what they see and hear or will they not be bothered at all? Will they be a part of that?

 

Next, comes the important decision of who they date and later who they marry. “He’s a good guy,” does not describe high spiritual fiber. He may be good with fixing the car. He may be good at making your daughter laugh. He may be good at making money. But will he join her on the spiritual journey to Heaven? Has there been any discussions, interest during the dating process? Will he be in bed on Sunday mornings as she tries to get the kids ready for church by herself? Will the kids beg to stay home like daddy does? Will he plead for your daughter not to go to church on Wednesday evenings? The marriage will never be as God intended it to be as long as one part of it does not follow Christ. He may be a good man until he dies, but it will never be what God wanted it to be.

 

Next, comes the decision of where we will live. So often, if the college choice was made without any thought to finding a thriving congregation, this decision will follow. The job may take you far away from God’s people. It may place you near some dying congregation that is so discouraging that you just give up. Oh, the house is fine. Big. Fancy. Newest stuff. Big TV. Lots of storage. But where’s God?

 

What happens next, living without God, things start to slip. Words are said that never were said before. Questionable things do not seem so questionable any more. Alcohol finds it’s way into the home and lifestyle. Happy. Busy. Lots of friends. But living without God.

 

One day, one of the parents die. You travel back home for the funeral. You decide to drop in to the church that was a part of your parents life. Oh, the memories it brings back. There are faces you still remember. The preaching is good. The singing warms your heart. There is something that you have long forgotten about, your soul. For a few days, you think about your parents choices in life. You think about where they are now, after they have died. You wonder about yourself. But, it’s back to your world. Your job calls you back. You jump back in and these pleasant memories are forgotten.

 

And one day, it’s your turn. Your death. Your are remembered by your kids. Your accomplishments are praised. You are missed as a good person. Your kids, having grown up without God, assume, that your journey has ended. You are gone. The End. But it’s not. There is never a “The End” to our story. To your horror, you learn that your parents were right. You learn too late, that just being good isn’t enough. You have lived without God and now, by your own choices, you will live forever without God.

 

All of this takes us back to the thought that God has a life that He wants you to live. Life, the way that it was meant to be, is a life that surrounds God. Every attitude. Every decision. Every choice. They are all made with thoughts of God and our relationship with Him. Will this person, will this job, will this town be such that helps me get closer to God or not?

 

Life, the way it was intended to be, is not without struggles, trials and pain. It is not without sin. We will sin. But, it is a life that bounces back. Instead of justifying the sin, it seeks the mercy of God and looks at why the wrong and cheap choice was made.

 

We can live better than what we are. We can do better than what we are doing.

 

Are you living your life the way that it was meant to be? Are you living your life the way God intended it to be? Why not?

 

Roger

 

27

Jump Start # 1815

Posted on March 27, 2017 by Jump Starts Daily in Jump Starts Daily | Tagged | Leave a comment

Jump Start # 1815

1 Peter 3:8 “To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted and humble in spirit; not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.”

“To sum up,” begins this lengthy passaged that is loaded with expressions of how we as Christians are to treat others. What Peter is summing up are relationships. Midway through chapter two Peter addresses the relationship that the Christian has with the government. There, the word is be submissive. He then moves on to the servant-master relationship. There, the word is be submissive. Be submissive to those who are unreasonable. Peter reminds us of Christ and how when suffering, He uttered no threats. No only did Christ die for us, but He left us footprints, or an example to follow when it comes to suffering.

 

Peter’s not done. The third chapter begins with the husband and wife. “In the same way,” this section begins. In what same way? Just as servants were to be to unreasonable masters, wives were to be to unreasonable husbands. The word there is submissive. Peter then moves to the husbands. You husbands, “in the same way.” There is that phrase again. In what way? Just as servants, just as wives, so husbands are to treat their wives, even if they are unreasonable.

 

Then comes our verse. “To sum up” – all these relationships. All these situations. Many of them, very difficult. A servant who had a cruel master, couldn’t just walk away and find another job. It didn’t work that way back then. He had to make the best of it by living as Christ did. He may endure cruel treatment, which we’d quickly announce as being unfair and not right, but there was little he could do.

 

What he was not to do was “return evil for evil, or insult for insult.” He was to be humble. He was to be kind. He was to be harmonious, sympathetic. This is the “summing up” that Peter was driving at.

 

I feel that to a degree, we get this and see this when we discuss the servant and master relationship. This makes for good discussion in Bible classes. It’s mostly talk and theory to us. We don’t face these same things today. We are not that kind of servants in this society. But Peter doesn’t leave his thoughts with the servant and master. He moves on to the home. It is here that “in the same way,” and “to sum up” apply. Now, it’s not theory and mere words. Now we look at our situation and now we are faced with living as Peter directs or we stand behind the complaint, “it’s not fair.”

 

There are several young couples that I know that are struggling in their marriages. Some have already given up and gotten a divorce. Many of these couples have been married for less than five years. Trouble. Hardship. Tons of tears. Some of these couples are not united in faith. A Christian married someone who wasn’t a Christian. They never got on the same page. Others, are believers, but wrong choices, mixed up expectations, a lack of patience, a lack of Christ and the marriage has already started coming apart at the seams. For some, it’s over even before it barely started. Trouble in paradise. Insults were passed between them. Name calling. Finger pointing. The foundation of marriage chipped away until one day someone suggests the “D” word, “Divorce.” The leading cause behind this is “I’m no longer happy.”

 

Satan has used happiness to sell his cheap goods and to dangle his fake trinklets before our eyes. Be happy. Everyone lived happily ever after. Even in church we sing, “I’m happy today, oh, yes, I’m happy today…” and there sits some of us, and we aren’t happy. All we can think about is how miserable, trapped and unhappy we are. The faults of our mate loom large in our minds. All we see is how disappointing our mate is. All around us, at work, in the movies, our friends, remind us that we deserve better. We deserve to be happy. The powder keg of injustice, unfairness and their lack of attention to the marriage builds and builds until we finally explode. No more. I’m out, or you are out. I’m done with this. And the marriage falls apart. Words are said, that may never be able to be overcome or healed. And the marriage falls apart.

 

Peter’s words, “In the same way,” illustrates for us that he is dealing with marriages that are unreasonable, just like servants endured from their master. You won’t find Peter telling a couple to look for the exit door. Christ suffered and never uttered threats in return. Servants are to be subject to unreasonable masters. Peter wants us, including couples, to be harmonious—that’s the word for harmony. Stop singing a solo. Stop going your own way. Work together. Bend where you can. It’s not all about you nor always having your way. You are singing together. Be sympathetic—feel what the other one is going through. How would you like to receive the treatment that you have been dishing out? What’s the other one going through. Don’t try to “one-up” their trials or pain. Maybe the job stinks. Maybe there are problems with the parents. Sympathize. Feel. Care. Compassion. We sing the song, “Does Jesus care?” And we know that He does. What we wonder is, “does my mate care?” Or, maybe we ought to ask, “Do I care?” Be sympathetic.

 

Brotherly is the next word. That’s the word that we use to describe our relationship with other Christians. We are family. We are connected. We trust. We care. We support. We are brothers. That fits in a marriage.

 

Kindhearted—be kind. Be kind from the inside out. Kind words. Kind deeds. Kind people do nice things for others. Kind people don’t have any room to be selfish. Usually when the marriage is coming off the tracts, kindness is one of the first things to go. We don’t feel kind. We feel hurt. Be kind.

 

Humble in spirit. Kill the pride. You are not perfect nor have you done everything right. In a marriage, the faults of the other are so glaring that we tend not to see our own. Be humble. Listen.

 

Then Peter says, don’t insult. Don’t do evil. Give a blessing. Give a blessing to unreasonable masters. Give a blessing to unreasonable mates. Remember, Jesus prayed for the salvation of His executioners.

 

Satan can weaken the church by chipping away at our marriages. Satan can get to us through our marriages. He wants to destroy our congregations. He wants to destroy our marriages. But mostly, he wants to destroy us. Troubles in marriage is hard on our faith. Parents don’t understand. It’s hard. It’s time we step up, change ourselves and remind ourselves that we made a promise to God and we are going to keep it. It doesn’t always work out that easily. For some, they want out no matter what. They have little regard for God and His ways. That is tragic.

 

I tend to think that we need a bit more “in the same way,” and “to sum up,” in our hearts and disposition.

 

May God help you. May you invite God’s help into your hearts and homes.

 

Roger