Jump Start # 1357

1 Peter 5:3 “nor yet as lording it over those allotted to your charge, but proving to be examples to the flock.”

  Yesterday in our Jump Start we discussed the importance of unity and how a congregation can become what I call a “huggin church.” That thought has stayed with me. I have been to places that seemed very cold and visitors felt very unwelcome. In such a place, growth usually stalls and indifference takes over. We must learn that some of the greatest and most important lessons are not those that come from the pulpit but rather what happens before and after services. The truth can be taught but if compassion, love and acceptance is not expressed between the folks in the pews, the lesson simply dies. Folks who have done wrong are afraid to return when the treatment is very similar to what the older brother was doing to the prodigal.

Part of leading God’s people is setting the right temperature among the people. Too often this is not thought about, taught nor practiced. Laodicea was a lukewarm place because it fell to that place. I really doubt that it started that way. Lukewarm doesn’t start anything. It won’t start a marriage. It won’t start a business and it especially won’t start following Jesus. No, they most likely started off like the rest of us, being disciples of Jesus. They were saved from their sins and set their eyes upon the horizon of Heaven. But along the way something happened. The passion died. Life took over. Prayers stopped. Worshipping became a habit and then a chore rather than a blessing. But while all of this was taking place and spreading, it also tells me that the leadership didn’t do anything.

For too long we’ve assigned the work of leading to simply making sure that what is taught is true and that the worship follows the pattern in the N.T. We’ve let the attitude, atmosphere and temperature of the place to be whatever it happens to be. Leaders must lead also in spirit and in setting forth the right atmosphere. This is not just true in church, but it is true in business and it is especially true at home. I have a friend who owns a Chick-fil-a. He is an incredible Christian and his upbeat spirit is all over his store. When things are not right, they will make it right. No one leaves upset. I was there once and had to wait a while. I was given a zillion coupons because I had to wait. I tried to turn some back in, but they wouldn’t hear of it. He has worked hard to get his staff to think outside of themselves. They are customer based. The place is always packed because they serve a good product and they serve it well. This just didn’t happen. My friend has hired several high school students. He has molded them, trained them and got them thinking the right way. I doubt if any of these kids will stay with this job the rest of their lives, however, what my friend has taught them, will. They see the difference it makes. This happened not by accident but by leadership. I have been to other places where I told myself that I would never go back because of the rudeness of the staff. Poor leadership. It showed.

This thought is before us as dads. When God made us the head of the home, it doesn’t mean that we get the choice seat in the living room and we control the remote. That’s not it at all. It means to lead. Not only are we leading the family to Heaven, but it’s up to us dads to set the atmosphere for the home. Gossiping, trash talking others, negative, complaining is only allowed if dad allows it. If dad is this way, so will everyone else. Dad leads. He sets the tone. He can change the temperature of the home by his words. His kindness and his tone can cool down a hot situation. His encouragement can get the lazy bones going. His ‘come do this with me,’ leadership gets others involved. He has learned how to smooth out the bumps and calm down the complaints. Leading for dad is tough business. Some homes are dysfunctional. In some homes everyone is the enemy. Some homes have long given up on love, getting along and forgiving each other. Shouts, screams and anger are as normal as watching TV. What’s happened is that the leadership, in this case, dad, has fallen off the job. He’s allowed it to get this way.

Our attention is about the church. Shepherds of the congregation must not only watch sheep, see that the teaching is true, but they are the ones who set the atmosphere of the place. Some churches are cold and unfriendly, because the leadership has allowed that. Others are that ‘huggin’ kind of church because the leadership has made that a priority. In Philip Keller’s masterpiece book about Psalms 23, he reveals three things that bother sheep. First, hunger. Second, bugs in the sheep’s ears. Third, tension in the flock. The shepherd must lead to the green pastures. That takes care of number 1. The shepherd must put his finger in the sheep’s ears and pull the bugs out. UGH. Shepherding isn’t easy. That takes care of # 2. Then there is the quiet waters. The shepherd must calm down the tension. Jesus did that with the disciples. He calmed their nerves when they were afraid. He brought them back to reality when they were thinking too highly of each other. Among those apostles were those from Galilee and one from Judea. Among them were a tax collector and a zealot. Different in thinking, feeling and interests. Jesus, the master leader, molded them into a unit. In three years, He had them as one. Often the gospels use the expression, “The twelve,” to refer to the apostles. They were twelve in number, but one in heart because of Jesus.

Shepherds today can spend decades with people and completely ignore the complaining, the back biting and the gossiping. Those things can ruin a church. They destroy the temperature. Those things feed tension among the flock. The church never does well that way.

Leading through spirit is something that God’s shepherds must do today. They must set the tone for love, acceptance and grace. A young single mom ought to feel welcomed without having to run through the gauntlet of stares, questions and judgmental attitudes. A new person ought to be as loved and welcomed as one who belonged to some of the first families. The teenager, the college student, the widow, the widower, the person of a different color, a different nationality ought to be loved, accepted and find the doors opened widely for them. This comes from the leadership. Complaints need to be dealt with. Leaders must do that. Tension must be dealt with. Leaders must do that. But smiles, hugs, bright eyes and open arms ought also be something that comes from the leadership. Elders must set the tone. Being standoffish isn’t the way that this is done. Being so high and mighty that folks can’t approach them isn’t the way either. Being so stiff that they don’t seem real doesn’t work. Coming across like they are perfect and forgetting that they too have a past and that they too were and are sinners doesn’t help. Some are afraid to talk to the elders. Why? Some would have a nervous breakdown if the elders came by to visit them at home. Why? Have some leaders become unapproachable? Have some become too good for the rest of us? Have some forgotten the valuable lesson of leading by example, as our passage indicates? Have some failed to see that they are setting the tone and temperature for the place? It’s a cold congregation because the leadership seems cold. Don’t we see this and get this?

It doesn’t help when the preacher also acts too big for his britches, as my grandma used to say. Some live as if they are dancing from cloud to cloud with the angels. A tattooed guy who is struggling just cannot connect with someone who seems too good for everyone else. We can look like artificial flowers that adorn the inside of church buildings. Most of those fake flowers are dusty and stiff. Give me real flowers. One of the greatest compliments one can receive is for someone to say, “You seem real, I can talk to you.” What’s the alternative? You seem fake? You seem dead? You seem different than the rest of us? Shame on us if that’s the impression we leave with others.

The answer to all of this is simply be yourself. Laugh at yourself. You’re not perfect and neither is anyone else, so quit acting that way. The church has wrinkles, bumps and warts, as we all do. Only Jesus is perfect. Only Jesus makes sense.

It’s important to make everyone feel comfortable, loved and welcome. It’s important for anyone, from children to the oldest among us, to feel that they could ask any question on their heart. They ought to feel that they are never bothering any of us. They should never be ashamed nor afraid to ask for material, prayers or help. We are a family and we must act that way.

This is what leaders must do. Set that spirit and that temperature. Laughter as well as serious conversations ought to be normal among all of us. Some folks have tears in their eyes. They need a special kind of attention. Others have a story to tell. They need a listening ear.

I think for a long time folks have been preached into Hell. It’s about time we started getting into the Heaven business. Heaven is good, right and where God is. The right spirit in worship, the right spirit after worship, the right spirit among each other, goes a long, long way to telling others, we want you here. We are all the same. We all need Jesus.

Leaders—in charge of the thermostat, not of the air conditioner, but of the tone of the congregation. This is where leading excels. This is where a difference is noted. This is where a cold church warms up. This is where ‘huggin’ begins.

Roger