Jump Start # 1171

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.”

  There are few verses in the Bible that better show the importance and value of fellowship than this statement from Solomon in Ecclesiastes. What a telling warning he gives, “But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.” Solomon may have in mind two laborers out in a field. One falls into a pit and he needs the other to help him out. But I see a much deeper and more valuable lesson for us today. How valuable our spiritual fellowship is when we have others to pull us up after we have fallen in worry or discouragement or sorrow.

Solomon is telling us that we can’t make it on our own. We need others. This is hard in our self serving society. We like to be the Lone Rangers. The truth is, even the Lone Ranger had Tonto. We need someone to talk to. We need someone to confess our sins with. We need someone who will pray for us. We need someone to kick us in the pants when we want to quit.

That person needs to be a Christian. Someone whose eyes and heart is set upon Heaven. You need that person whose advice and words are sprinkled with Biblical truth. Just having a friend isn’t enough. That person may not lift you up. They may actually make the hole you are in seem deeper and darker. Advice is like a nose on your face. Everyone has one and they all think theirs is the best. In the areas of morals, parenting, marriage, hurt feelings, forgiveness and spiritual growth—godly advice based upon God’s word is the best. It’s a must.

Our passage involves two things about friends.

First, one recognized that his friend had fallen. He saw that he needed lifting up. Close relationships will do this. Body language, attitudes, behavior all point to a soul that is soaring or one that is crashing. A simple “how ya doin’” at church isn’t going to be enough. Most of us respond, “Ok.” We say “ok,” even when we are not ok. We say that because it hurts to tell the truth. Telling how we really feel is too complicated and too involved. So the key here is one notices that the other has fallen. The friend takes action. He reaches down to lift him up. He doesn’t let him stay in the pit. What friend is that? He does what he can. This is what friendship is all about. It takes time and effort to pull one out of the pit he has fallen into. When dealing with emotional, mental and relationship issues, the lifting up may require some time. The friend does that. He wants the other out of the pit. He’s there for him. He’s with him until he is out of the pit.

Second, the guy who is in the pit allows the other to pull him out. He doesn’t refuse help. He doesn’t stay in the pit. This can be just as hard as helping someone out. Some of us can be closed lipped when it comes to our feelings. Things bother us and we won’t open up. We get down and family and friends want to help us but we put on the stubborn hat and refuse help. So in the pit we stay. Our friends get frustrated with us because they want to help us, but we won’t let them. Weeks can pass and we remain in a sour and dark mood. Help is there. Friendships are there. Spiritual support is there. When a hand reaches out to us, we must take hold of it and allow the other to pull us up. It’s ok to need help. It’s not a sign of failure that you got this way. Get over all that stuff. Get out of the pit and get about doing what God wants you to do.

This type of relationship is the key in a church. It starts with trust and great friendships. Bless be the bond that ties us all together. That bond is Jesus. We all need Jesus and we all need each other. This is true of elderships and this is true of preachers. Sometimes we start believing that we are superman, but we are not. There are pits that we fall into. Those pits can ruin us, especially if our pride refuses to allow others to pull us up.

It is sad to think that there are some who do not have that connection. They do not know who to call in a crisis. They do not have close spiritual friendships. They attend a congregation, but they have never gotten close to anyone. They recognize some faces. They know some names but that’s the extent of it. When they fall into a pit, no one notices because they have kept people from being close to them. They do not feel connected. Emotional and spiritual turmoil gets them and much too often fingers are pointed at the church when much of the blame falls upon them for being standoffish. They never invited anyone into their home. They never accepted invitations to go to other homes. They never came to get togethers. They never associated with others outside the building. They had their own friends and family and most are not Christians. One day they fall into a deep pit and no one notices. They do not know what to do so they sink deeper into despair and discouragement.

I’ve been in pits before. They are not pretty. They are dark. Things seem worse when you are in a pit. It’s hard to see the sunshine in a pit. Blessings aren’t counted when you are in a pit. For me, I had that friend who reached his hand down and pulled me up. It made all the difference. He was there. He noticed. I needed him.

What we are talking about is not experienced in very many places. Fellowship is more than a name in a directory. It is lives that crisscross each other. It’s love and care for one another. It’s prayers that are offered for each other. It’s knowing that someone is watching out for me and I’m watching out for others. Today, I may be in the pit. Tomorrow, it may be someone else. I need to allow others to pull me out just as I need to be there to pull others out. It’s togetherness. Together we work. Together we worship. Together we journey to Heaven. We need each other. We are a part of each other. We do more than simply go to the same church, we are family, in the truest sense. We love, play, work, fuss and are there for each other. We want the best for each other. We are in this together.

This is what a church ought to be like. This is the key. This is fellowship. Doing things for each other. Being there. Sitting in the stands watching their kids play ball. Going to their kids graduations. Being in the audience when their kids get married. Lives that are full of memories.

I’m blessed to be part of a church like this. Amazing. Connected. Awesome. Perfect? No. Problems? Certainly. Need things to work on? Absolutely. But a family. A family in Christ.

You need this in your life. Who will notice you have fallen? You will pull you out of the pit? Who is watching you? Instead of pulling apart, we need to be pulling together. Instead of fussing all the time, we need to be counting our blessings more. Fellowship—I think of it as “fellows in a ship.” We must work together or the ship might go down.

Thanks to bro. B. You are a true friend and amazing at pulling someone, like me out of a pit.

Roger