Jump Start  # 845

Proverbs 14:1 “The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.”

I’ve thought about this passage for some time. Where I live there is a lot of home construction going on. Early in the morning the trucks fly down the street and before long the sound of hammers and saws fill the air. I can see houses in various stages of construction. Our passage today is about building a house. I don’t think the intention is a literal construction with the hammering of nails and sawing boards as it is what takes place within that home. The best constructed house doesn’t mean that the best constructed family will walk out the front door. It’s up to mom and dad to construct the family, the home.

Our passage is defining the role of mom in the house. The wise woman builds the house. The N.T. word, “encourage,” or “encouragement,” means to “build up.” Construction of the heart, soul and morals is what we are talking about. A wise woman does much more than feed the family and keep the house clean. She is busy “building a home.” Those little ones will someday move out and be big ones. When that happens, what attitudes, expectations, work ethics, morals will they move out with. This is the type of construction that mom is engaged in.

The wise woman builds. She does that by:

• Setting the tone and the temperature of the home. She can be a nagger and complainer and her kids will grow up being the same or worse. She can be demanding and they will learn from that. She can be mean and negative and the kids will be like that. Or, she can be kind, positive and loving. Home can be the place kids can’t wait to leave or a place they love to come to. The tone and temperature determine that.

• Establishing boundaries, accountability and forgiveness. Kids need rules. Rules serve as boundaries, guidelines. They are like fences. They keep us from crossing into dangerous places. Cows need fences. Without a fence, cows get in the road. Years ago there was a farmer whose cows got out, often. Once, a car hit one of the cows. It wasn’t pretty. Kids need rules. Without rules they ruin themselves. They need bedtimes. They need to do homework. They need to clean up around the house. They need to know how to cut the yard, do laundry, and change a tire. Why? Someday they will be out on their own. Kids like to push buttons. They like to cross the line. Most of us did that. When they do wrong they need to face the consequences. Discipline is part of life. Going by rules is a part of life. They need to know that. Yet, when they have been wrong and are sorry, they need to see forgiveness and love. The prodigal knew he could come home. Some prodigals fear home. Some prodigals would rather stay with the pigs than go home. A wise woman builds her house.

• Showing God. The home is the first place where children learn about God. Home is where the Bible is first talked about. Home is where prayers are offered. Home is where we get ready to go to church services. Home is where hospitality is practiced. Children should have their own Bibles. They should be taught how to use it, take care of it, and to read it. The wise woman is building.

Our passage ends with this sad statement, “…the foolish tears it down with her own hands.” Dysfunction. Destruction. Selfishness. Abuse. Addictions. Neglect. Ungodly. Godless. Do we need any more words to get the ugly picture. It’s all around us. TV shows are raising kids, instead of parents. How sad. No rules. No accountable. No God. No forgiveness. No church. No respect. Is it surprising that we see more and more violence by young people in our country. The fences are torn down and the cows are in the streets. They are doing what they feel like and what they know. And when they are arrested, their moms always say the same thing, “He’s a sweet boy.” No he’s not. He’s a bad boy. He’s broken the law, taken life and this is a result of living in a house that was torn down.

Moms, you are building. Don’t give up. You are doing a great work! Some days you wonder if you are accomplishing anything. You are. Keep at it. You are doing some of the best evangelistic work ever done!

Roger