Jump Start # 838

Proverbs 31:11 “The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.”

We continue our look this week at Proverbs 31, the virtuous woman. She is called an excellent wife. There are multiple reasons why she is called this. One of those reasons is found in our verse today, she is trustworthy.

The passage states it this way, “the heart of her husbands trusts in her…” That is interesting that it says, “the heart of her husband.” Deep inside, he trusts her. This is not a situation in which he verbally says he trusts her, but wonders about her on his insides. The expression implies that he really trusts her. He has no doubts about her. He feels this way because she has shown herself to be trustworthy.

Two thoughts here:

First, trust isn’t automatically given because someone gets married. Repeating vows to each other doesn’t insure or guarantee trust. Just because someone says, “trust me,” or, “believe in me,” or, “I’m telling you the truth,” doesn’t mean they are. Trust is earned. There is no other way to get trust. It is earned by keeping your word. It is earned by being dependable. It is earned by sticking with your promises. Once trust is broken, it is hard and often long, before it can be regained. The excellent wife was trustworthy. That is important. She was out doing things. She was buying fields, selling linens and planting vineyards. She was making important decisions. She was engaged in business. She was exchanging with the public. Some can’t trust their mate just to go to the mall.

Trust is the foundation of all relationships, but especially the family. When trust is gone, a person is suspicious of the other. They are checking on the other. They are watching the other. Teenagers that try to deceive their parents eventually get caught and the web of deception crashes in on them. They become grounded and restricted because they are not trusted. They tell their parents that they are going to house A but they end up at house B, C, and D. That was their plan all along. They thought they could get one by their parents. Those who are not trusted are watched closely. Our passage shows that she was trustworthy.

Second, there are many aspects to trust. This quality of the heart involves more than just being honest. Flirting eyes, questionable emails and secrets are indications that trust is falling apart. Why would someone do these things? They know they are wrong, so they try to hide them from their mate. At that moment, they have thrown out trust. They are being deceitful and dishonest. When discovered, tears, broken hearts and possibly a broken marriage will result.

Trustworthy. This means being honest. Honest with your words. Honest with the money. Honest about where you have been and what you have been doing. There are things a person can do to ensure the trust factor. If you are supposed to be home at a certain hour, but are delayed, call your mate and tell them why. Not finished at work…terrible traffic…stopped by a store…openness, communication are the keys to building trust. Never put yourself in a position that may damage trust or bring suspicion. A married man should not be alone with a woman he is not married to. If they must talk business, then do so with others around, with the office door open, in a public place and keep the business to business. Sharing personal and private things with the opposite sex are the first steps on a dangerous path that may crash a marriage. Be trustworthy. Share with your mate who you talked to. Let your mate know your passwords to your email accounts. No secrets.

When this chapter tells us that the excellent wife considers a field and purchases it, don’t you think she talked it over with her husband? This business of my money and her money goes out the window when the two became one. One bank account. Communication in finances is important or the budget gets wrecked. Look at congress. What a mess. The same is happening in many homes. Money woes is the number one cause for divorce today.

Why does our verse end with the expression, “he will have no lack of gain”? Could it be that the writer is considering the subject of finances. They are on the same page and are working together. He has gain because he trusts her. She is not running the family into bankruptcy. She is not out buying things without his knowledge.

When trust is lacking, jealously takes over. The jealous heart is a miserable heart.

We need to take the words of this passage to heart. We need to be trustworthy. Two people who get married because their hearts skip a beat when they are together, but don’t trust each other, will have a short time together.

Are you trustworthy at work? Most company theft comes from employees, not outsiders. Many companies have had to install cameras and security measures just to watch the workers. They are not trustworthy.

Are you trustworthy at home? How about at church? This means to be dependable. This means that others can count on you.

What an honor it is for others to trust you. It is a serious position to be in.

Roger