Jump Start # 1822
Proverbs 6:23-24 “For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching is a light; and reproofs for discipline are the way of life to keep you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress.”
Our own former governor of Indiana, now the current Vice President, took a lot of scorning from the media for proclaiming that he would not meet nor eat alone with a woman who was not his wife. Scandalous some are accusing him. The second highest position in the government would not meet in private with another woman? But the vice president has had a long standing practice of this before he ever went to Washington. He meets with other women often, but not alone. Someone else is always there. This provides a witness. This keeps accusations from being said. This keeps things above board.
Old fashioned, as modern media insiders are calling this, is nothing more than protecting his reputation, his marriage and keeping temptation at arms length. For years, preachers have given this same advice to younger preachers. Some have ignored this advice. Some have gotten themselves in trouble because of this.
Our verse today, coming from a two chapter section of Proverbs that warns about sexual sins and the deadly destruction of failing to keep your guard up is the same thing that the Vice President is practicing. Godly wisdom will keep you from “the evil woman.” It will guard your heart. It will keep you out of harms way. Even though you may never have such intentions, the other person might.
The most common area that affairs are found is from the work place setting. Working late at night with someone you are not married to, catching a bite to eat with someone you are not married to, together, out of town on business—the settings are all there for conversations to turn from work to personal matters. In time, there is a connection. The work partner listens so much better than my mate does. They understand. They really care. A touch. An exchange of the eyes. And the next thing you know, the lines are crossed and sin has been committed. A vow has been broken. Now a secret must be kept secret. Lies are told. In far too many situations, the heat of passion becomes too much to leave and so the thought crosses the mind and then that thought is expressed, it’s time to end the marriage. I have found someone else. I no longer love you. Tears are shed. A family is torn apart. People don’t understand. A church is harmed. Christ is shamed.
This is happening over and over and over. Nearly every congregation has seen a marriage fall apart. Nearly every congregation can tell the sad story of an affair that killed the trust within a family. It’s happening among preachers. It’s happening among elderships. Affairs are taking place within the congregation. The movies, the sit-coms, the TV dramas all show the fun, the good and the upside of sex outside of marriage. It is crushing God’s church. It is removing men from leadership roles. It is disillusioning children who are confused and don’t understand. Not only are we showing the world that we cannot stay married, we are showing the world that we cannot remain faithful. If we can’t keep that promise, what other promises can we not keep? The line of separation between the world and the believer becomes thinner and thinner. Saved folks are simply not acting like they are saved, especially in the area of sexuality and faithfulness to their marriages. The addiction to porn is yet another major problem facing tons of families in the church today. It’s not just men and porn, the number of women and porn is sky rocketing. And now, the sex industry is producing sex robots for a person to have physical relations with. There seems to be no bottom to the sewer.
And in all of this downward spiral, rises a hero, from all places, Washington and from all people, a politician who refuses to meet with a woman alone. He has put a stake in the ground. He will not compromise. He takes his marriage seriously. He will not be accused of sexual sins, because he will never be found alone with another woman. Above board. Making himself visible, accountable and trustworthy. We praise the decisions and the choice he made to protect his love and commitment to his marriage. From this worthy example we take note. We can do the same. Difficult as it may be. Awkward as it may put us in. Being considered a prude, old-fashioned, out of touch, it remains true that temptation is held at bay.
Office flirting and teasing has no place among married people who are not married to each other. Watch the compliments toward the other sex. Guard what you say and what you mean. Be careful with hugs. Even after church services, some can get too friendly and some can make others uncomfortable. Don’t be kissing another woman that you are not married to unless it’s your mamma or your daughter.
The Proverb passage is trying to prevent trouble from happening. Carelessness, arrogance that believes nothing will ever happen, being foolish are all contributing factors that allows Satan to come knocking on the door of our hearts. He’s patient. He’ll wait until we are vulnerable. We waits until it’s late at night. He waits until we are alone. He waits until we are tired. He waits. But he’s there. A thought. A image. A temptation. He’s ready to knock on the door of your heart.
You, too, can keep a similar policy as our Vice President. Don’t be alone with someone of the opposite sex that you are not married to. Don’t dine with someone of the opposite sex alone. Keep your guard up. Watch your eyes. Stay away from things that chip away at moral purity. Some shows ought to be off limits. Some places ought to be out of bounds. Be transparent with your mate. No lies. No secrets. No hiding things. Let your mate know your passwords. Let them read your texts, if they want. There is nothing to be afraid of if you are pure, honest and above board. It’s the person who is doing things that they shouldn’t that wants to keep secrets.
Be pure—is the call of the New Testament. It’s getting harder to be pure in the sewer that society has become. It can be done. You may be unique, like our Vice President, in what you do. It’s better to be the hero and be cool at home, and be viewed as no fun by others, than it is the other way around.
Protect your marriage. You made a promise to your mate and to your God. Keep it!
Roger