Jump Start # 1460

Matthew 7:12 “In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you, for this is the Law and the Prophets.”

  We know this as the golden rule. The Bible never calls it that, but it is fitting because it is “golden” or the best. Found within the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus establishes principles by which His disciples shall live. How we treat others affects our relationship with God. That principle was stated earlier in the sermon when Jesus taught about prayer. There, in chapter 6, Jesus said, “For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.” How we behave with one another affects our relationship with God. We can’t be wrong with each other and right with God.

So, this golden rule, as we know it, sets forth a profound concept. Treat others, like you would want to be treated. That principle looks to the good of the person and the rightness of God, rather than how they have treated you. This principle isn’t reactionary. Most have a hard time with this. This isn’t easy. It never was intended to be. If someone is short with us, we tend to pull back. If someone is all business, then we are all business. If someone is rude, we tend to walk away. If someone is mean, we leave. In some situations, if someone is aggressive, we respond with aggression back. This is where arguments, strife and turmoil comes from.

The golden rule works well in Mr. Roger’s neighborhood, where everyone gets along and is nice. But Mr. Roger’s is dead and his neighborhood doesn’t exist. We work with those who want to chop our legs out from under us. They want to dump work on us and then take credit for what we have done. Some work environments are very hostile. The number one reason folks switch jobs is because they cannot get along with fellow workers. But it doesn’t end there. Neighbors get fussy with one another. Family members get jealous and hurt one another. Brethren gossip and ignore certain ones. Trouble in paradise!

It’s easy to treat others nice who I know will be treating me nice back. It’s the guy who acts like the barking dog that makes this hard. It’s one who doesn’t seem to have a kind bone in his body that makes this hard. The selfish person who takes and takes and never gives. That’s the challenge. Treating others the way you want to be treated. This principle is similar to “Love your neighbor as yourself.”

So, how do I want to be treated? How do I want others to treat me? Understanding this, gives me a beginning point of how I ought to be treating others. Here is a short list that I came up of how most of us would like to be treated:

• We would like for people to hear us and listen to how we feel about things. Don’t assume. Don’t guess that you know how I feel. Listen. Ask.
• Most would want to be treated with respect and kindness. Value the good that has been done. When there are disagreements, there isn’t any need for shouting, cold shoulders, silence or indifference.
• We want to be loved. Not so much the emotional stuff, but the “God so love the world,” kind. The love that cares about how a person is doing. The care that wants the best for a person.
• We want honesty. Lying kills relationships. Lying destroys trust. We want people to tell us the truth.
• We want to be given a chance. We may not be the best, but give us an opportunity to show what we can do.
• Smiles go a lot further than frowns. Laughter helps.
• We want an atmosphere in which we can be ourselves. We don’t want to be so tense that we can’t say what we feel nor be ourselves.
• We want people not to take advantage of us. Whether we are buying a car, having something serviced, or simply in a conversation, we don’t want the feeling that we have been sold something that we will later regret.
• We don’t want people talking about us in a negative way. That hurts feelings and ruins relationships.
• We want people to care, really care.
• We don’t want to be intimidated because of someone’s education, position, age or wealth. We want to be accepted even though we may not be varsity material.
• When we have hurt others or let them down, we would want to be forgiven.

Imagine the work place if these principles were applied. Imagine the congregation if everyone went by these things. Imagine home. Imagine the neighborhood. The point of Jesus’ passage is not for us to go around telling others what they ought to do and how we ought to treat us, but rather, this is how we ought to treat them. Even though they do not deserve it. Even though they may not appreciate it. Even though we may never receive the same back from them. Even though this is painful and hard. This is how we ought to treat others. This is how we would want to be treated.

This is what Jesus is wanting from you. This is the basis of your relationship toward others. It might be good for you to make your own list of “How I would like to be treated.” That list, then becomes your guideline on how to treat others.

This is light shinning stuff. This is not being conformed to the world. This is doing what is right when it is not expected, deserved or even wanted. This is being Jesus.

Treat others the way you would like to be treated.

Roger

Jump Start # 180 

Matthew 7:12 “In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you, for this is the Law and the Prophets.”

  This week, Jump Starts will take a look at Matthew 7, the third chapter of the Sermon on the Mount. We start with one of the best known verses from that chapter, what we call the golden rule. The Bible actually doesn’t use that expression, “golden rule,” but we can understand where it got that expression. It is the best rule. It is above all other rules. It is the rule that would change the way people treat one another.

  This “rule” of Jesus is proactive, instead of reactionary. It is based on a theory not a reality. Here is what I mean. We typically are reactionary people. If someone is kind, we are kind back. If they are in our face, our defenses are up and we back off. We respond to the way they treat us. This “rule” doesn’t do that. Without saying the word, Jesus is showing us Biblical love, the Greek word, AGAPE. This love isn’t a feeling or an emotion, it is a choice. A person choose to be kind, or nice, or helpful, or forgiving. This love is not based upon the other person’s attitude nor reaction. It is one directional. This is what is beneath the surface of the “rule” of Matthew 7. It means you choose a behavior instead of responding to a behavior. That’s hard! But it is what God desires.

  Secondly, this “rule” is based upon a theory. Jesus said, “treat people the same way you want them to treat you.” The way you want them to treat you, not the way they ARE treating you. This is a theory. It may never happen to you, but you can make it happen to others. We’d love for people to be forgiving when we mess up and are wrong. Often we get our heads chewed off, at home, at work and at the store. We’d like people to give us a second chance. That doesn’t happen very often. We’d like people to be kind, generous and good to us. Instead we get grumpy, dumpy and stupid as bosses, waitresses, and store clerks. We wonder at the end of the day, “is there anybody nice anymore?” And the answer is “yes.” We are. We are to treat people the way we would like to be treated.

  Now doing this necessitates grace on our part. Because, first of all, most people do not deserve to be treated kind and nice. A swift kick would probably do them more good. But this is exactly what God did for us. We were not deserving of His grace and yet He offered it to us. Romans says, “While we were yet sinners Christ died for us” (Rom 5:8). Being kind to rude and grumpy people is hard. At the best, we’d like to ignore them. At the worst, we want to throw the same attitudes back at them. But that’s not what Jesus expects of His disciples.

  Treat them the way you would like to be treated! Three things often happen when you do this:

1. First, grumpy and mean people soften up, even if for just a moment. It’s hard to be a grouch when someone goes out of their way to be nice.

2. It definitely makes you feel better. When you get down in the mud with someone and have a cat fight, the result is ugly. Being kind, gracious and generous warms the soul. Jesus said, it is better to give than receive. That works in so many different ways.

3. Some people remain mean. They seem to be stuck on that and content to be miserable everyday God has given them. Not everyone is changed by the golden rule. That is not reason for us to stop or give up. We are to do this, because Jesus wants us to.

  Do you remember the ultimate expression of the Golden Rule? It’s found in the gospels. Jesus is dying on the cross, and He looks down at the very people who drove the nails into His hands and feet and prayed, “Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.” That’s GOLD!

That’s Jesus. And He wants His people to follow that example!

  Try it today. Try treating people the way you would like to be treated. It changes things and it changes you!

Roger