Jump Start # 2592

Matthew 20:20 “Then the mother of the sons of Zebedee came to Jesus with her sons, bowing down and making a request of Him.”

We celebrated Mother’s day this past Sunday. Our moms do so much for us and too often it’s a thankless job that is driven by love. No one loves those little babies as much as their mama does. Mother’s day always brings a mix bag of emotions. For some, their mom is no longer with them. That is my story. Worse, for some their relationship with their mom is not healthy. Mother’s day is not a day of smiles, memories and joy for these folks. It’s tense, painful and full of confusion.

Our passage today is about a mom. She was the wife of Zebedee. She had two sons, James and John, who were among the chosen apostles. Those two, along with Peter, made that tight inner circle with Jesus. So many times we read of Peter, James and John. This is their mom. She comes to Jesus. She has a request. She needs to ask Jesus something.

Now, remember, James and John are not in the third grade. They are grown fishermen. They are likely close to the age of Jesus, possibly around thirty years old. Mom, needs to tell Jesus something. Imagine your mom coming to your place of work and wanting to make a request to your boss. Most of us would run and hide. We’d be embarrassed. “What is she doing,” we’d think.

When the Lord asked her what she needed, she said that she’d like each of her boys sitting on either side of the Lord in His kingdom. One boy on the right side and the other on the left side. Top positions. Let my boys be vice-presidents of this operation. Put them right up there at the top. Put them right beside Jesus. Mama Z thought Jesus was going places and she wanted to make sure her boys were going to be included. She didn’t want them left out. She didn’t want them on the sidelines. Right side and left side, that’s were she thought her boys belonged. She wanted her boys in positions above the rest of the apostles. Only one person can sit on the right side of Jesus. And, only one person can sit on the left side. She wanted her boys covering those spots. No one else. Not one boy on the right and let the Lord pick who will be on the left. Not one boy on the right and Peter on the left. Not for this mamma bear. She is fighting for both boys. She wants them both up at the top. One on the right and one on the left.

The Lord’s first reply was, “you do not know what you are asking.” Mama Z didn’t get it. This wasn’t a ride to the top. This wasn’t a ground floor operation and in just a short time they’d be sitting in the penthouse suite. Jesus’ kingdom wasn’t like that. His kingdom, He told Pilate, was not of this world. His kingdom was spiritual. Jesus was about to drink a cup of suffering. He was going to be rejected, abused and murdered. Can they drink that cup, He asks her and the James and John? This isn’t the picture you boys were dreaming of. This isn’t going to turn out the way you think it is. They won’t be rich. No one will be opening doors for them, buying them meals and giving them keys to the city. Instead, it will be jails, hunted down, ugly accusations and serious threats against them.

Now, some lessons from this:

First, moms always want the best for their children. Sometimes moms close their eyes to any wrong that their children do and that is not healthy. No one is perfect. Some would rather sue the world than to admit that their little darling has done anything wrong. In teaching the principles of marriage, God said that a man was to leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife. That was first spoken in Genesis and the Lord repeated it in Matthew. Leaving is not about location, but maturity, responsible and able to stand on your own feet. But, this is a two way street. The man is to leave father and mother, and the father and mother need to let the child go. Problems arise in young marriages when parents interfere and try to run that household as well. Parents must understand the difference between something being spiritually wrong and just a difference in tastes and judgments. Your grown children will do things differently than you do. A time for a parent to speak up is when they see their child harming their soul spiritually. But if we are fussing with them all the time, they will just tune us out.

Years ago, I was walking with one of my kids, who was in college at that time, through a hardware store. We passed a line of toilets for sale. One was black. He’d never seen a black toilet. He loved it. Soon, we were walking by the appliances. He spotted a black refrigerator and stove. Then there was a black dishwasher he spotted. His mind was running. He said, “Someday, I’m going to get all those black things. I think I’ll paint the walls black.” I thought, that’s the dumbest thing I ever heard. I said, “do you want to live in a cave?” But then I caught myself and said, “Go for it, if that’s what you want.” Is it wrong to have all black appliances and black walls? No. Can one go to Heaven like that? Yes. Would I do that? Never!

My son, Jordan preaches. He’s an amazing preacher. But I don’t like how he organizes his books on the shelves. Guess what? He doesn’t like the way I organize my books on my shelf. Can we both go to Heaven the way we are doing things? Yes. That’s what parents have to understand. Your child will do things differently than you do things. If it is not spiritually wrong, let it go and let them do it. Don’t nag. Don’t guilt them into changing things your way. Parents have to let their grown children go. Tough lesson for many of us.

Second, Mama Z, had some grand ambitions for her two sons. She wanted them near Jesus. You can’t get any closer than right hand and left hand. She saw something good in Jesus. She wanted her boys involved with what Jesus was doing. She didn’t want her sons just dabbling in this work. She wanted them fully invested. Right hand and left hand meant key conversations, intimate discussions, first to know things, advisors, deeply involved. She didn’t just want the boys to “go to church” once in a while. Right up there with Jesus.

Now, that’s a thought. What do moms today want for their children? Good grades. Meet someone cute, get married. Find a great job. Make as much money as possible. Play ball for a division I school? What about spiritually? How many moms today are thinking, “I’d like my boys to preach someday.” Or, “I’d like to see my boys be shepherds in God’s church someday.” Have you prayed those prayers? What are you doing about that? Are you putting them around those who would be great examples? Do we even think about our spiritual future of our children other than just become Christians? Do we think about how they can help the kingdom?

You just have to love this mother. She went to Jesus. She was bold. She was a bit forward. The boys would probably never say anything, she must have thought, so I will.

James and John—two apostles. The first apostle to die and the last apostle to die.

Let’s be putting some thoughts into our children’s spiritual future. That thought begins at home.

Roger

Jump Start # 1849

Matthew 20:20 “Then the mother of the sons of Zebedee came to Jesus with her sons, bowing down and making a request of Him.”

With Mother’s Day upon us I thought it would be good to look at this story of the mother of James and John. This was a mother who believed in her sons. We are not told if she did this on her own or if she and her boys had been talking about this. She comes to Jesus and asks if her two boys can sit on the right and the left in His kingdom.

We have to take a step back and look at what is taking place here. James and John are not in the fourth grade. They are grown men. They have their own jobs. If they are close to Jesus’ age, then they are in their 30’s. Can you imagine your mom going to your place of work and asking your boss to promote you?

Our passage shows that she had respect in what she did. She came and bowed to Jesus. She requested, not demanded. Jesus would not grant this request. The context ends by stating the other ten apostles became indignant with James and John. Tensions flared.

There are some commendable things about this mother.

First, she believed in what Jesus was doing. Jesus had just told the disciples that He was going to be crucified in Jerusalem and be raised up on the third day. Her request follows those words. She believed that Jesus was doing something good. She wanted her boys involved in that work. Rather than saying, “Don’t get too close to that Jesus, He’s going to be killed,” she wanted her boys right beside Him.

Second, she wanted her boys to be actively involved in the Kingdom work. Sitting on the right and left hand, meant positions of authority. She wanted her boys to be engaged deeply in the Lord’s kingdom. No sitting on the sidelines. No sticking your big toe in the water. She wanted them right there, right where Jesus was. Of all the things a mother could ask, she didn’t ask for her boys to be safe. She didn’t ask for a long life for her boys. She wanted her boys to be right beside Jesus.

Third, she had big expectations for her boys spiritually. The Lord’s work wasn’t paying off financially for the disciples. They weren’t getting rich. They weren’t dealing in real estate. They weren’t rubbing elbows with Jerusalem’s upper class. There were no limo rides. No banquets. No celebrity red carpet walks. That wasn’t the way of Christ. The multitudes that first heard Him were common folks, mostly poor. They didn’t have anything to give the Lord other than their devotion and their hearts. Requesting that her boys sit on either side of Jesus was not going to secure their future financially. She saw something more important.

I am impressed with this mother. Although she didn’t fully understand what she was asking, her heart was in the right place and she was wanting her boys to do well spiritually. She saw goodness with the Lord. She wanted her boys close to Jesus.

I look at what this mother requested, and wonder if parents today would feel the same. Do we push our kids to be stars on the stage and on the field, knowing that the price that they will have to pay to succeed often will pull them away from the Lord. Instead of being beside the Lord, we are leading our kids the other way. Go for the scholarship. Go for the full ride. Get to a university and little thought is given if there is a decent church for them to attend. The demands of college sports and staying up with classes can result in kids skipping worship services. Their teammates usually are not high spiritual fiber people. Absence from God’s people and worship and hanging around those that do not know or care about the Lord, and after four years they leave the school spiritually weak or dead. James and John’s mother wasn’t after that. She wanted her sons next to Jesus. The inner circle. Close. Involved.

When you look into that little 8 year old’s eyes, do you think, I hope someday he’ll serve God’s people as an elder or a preacher? Do we share those dreams with our kids? Do we have spiritual hopes and dreams for our children? Do we “talk up” God’s kingdom? Do we place a high value on spiritual things? Or, do we think, and maybe even say, “You can do better than preach.” “Why would you want to be an elder?” So different, than a mom who wanted her boys on the right and left side of Jesus.

Here are a few suggestions:

• Your kids need to have their own Bibles. Have visiting preachers sign those Bibles. My kids still have theirs. Looking at those signatures is like walking down memory lane of many godly men who loved and preached God’s word. Several have passed on. In our home, preachers were heroes.

• As your kids get older, let them know the elders personally. My youngest two, when in high school, used to take one of the elders out on a regular basis to get root beer floats and hear his war stories. I was not invited. It was something that they wanted to do. To this day, that dear man is very close to their hearts. There was generations separating those conversations, but there was goodness and appreciation for the Lord that bound them together.

• Get your family actively involved with the congregation you attend. Participate. Attend. Have people over. Help out. Do what you can. On a work day, bring the kids down to the church house and pull weeds. Get them to the Gospel Meetings, VBS and other things. Showing them that the kingdom is important will raise the bar on what you will see in their lives. I don’t think Jesus randomly picked the first twelve men he saw to be his apostles. Although the apostles had some trouble grasping what all Jesus said, the Lord never had to get on them for moral issues. We never find Peter drunk. We don’t find John spending the night with his girl friend. These were quality spiritual people that Jesus chose. They loved God. All of this began, not when they started walking with Jesus, but as they were raised by their families. Congregations need to provide opportunities for young Christian men to serve. This is where they first get a taste of helping and teaching. Talk it up.

• Help guide them into fields of study that will serve others. Making the most money isn’t the main thing. Finding something that you have a passion for, can glorify God with and make a difference in the lives of others is essential. Help them. Talk about the ups and downs of different jobs. Keep the spiritual picture before their eyes.

• Pray for the spiritual success of your children. We can’t go to Jesus as James and John’s mother did, but we can bow to the Lord in prayer. We pray for our children’s health and safety, what about their spiritual wellbeing? Pray that they grow in the Lord. Pray that they can help others spiritually. Pray that they will be strong and powerful in the Lord. Pray that they will make wise spiritual choices in their lives.

Do you remember what happened to James and John? James was the first apostle to be martyred. John was the last apostle to die. First and last. A mom who wanted her boys to stick close to Jesus, be involved in the kingdom and participate in the greatest work in the world. Not a bad ambition. Maybe if more moms wished for that, the world would be a better place.

Roger