Jump Start # 3645

1 Timothy 3:15 “but in case I am delayed, I write so that you will know how one ought to conduct himself in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and support of truth.”

The church is often described as a family—the family of God. In our passage today, the apostle uses the expression, “the household of God.” God’s family, we might call that. In the model prayer, Jesus begins by calling God “Our Father.” If God is our Father, then we are not only related to Him and His children, but we are related to one another. We are brothers and sisters in the Lord.

I like thinking of the congregation as family, my family. I love my family. Love my kids and love all those grandchildren. Some days they fuss at each other, just as I did with my sibilings. Some days they can annoy each other with dumb jokes or hearing something that dad wants to tell them. All families have bumps, warts and blessings and challenges. That’s life. That’s family.

Some how it’s hard to translate that to our spiritual family. Some come to worship, saying little, leave quickly and are no where to be found during the week. The connections they have are not strong and not very deep. They don’t think about their spiritual family. They don’t include the spiritual family in their lives. And, as a result, fellowship is more of a word than a deep love for each other.

Now, in other congregations, it’s just the opposite. You can tell. The conversations, laughter, love and sharing of life runs very deep. You hear of people getting together often throughout the week. And, when it’s time to gather to worship, there is a deep and precious joy found in being with each other.

So, what can be done to bring the church into more of a “family” atmosphere?

First, it begins by understanding each congregation has a culture and that culture can change. Just because we are not that way doesn’t mean we can’t become that way. The culture begins to shift when the language changes. Use the word “family” more than the word “church.”  Express it publically. Say it in prayers. Preach it. And, not just one time, but over and over and over.

In our congregation, we say just about every single week, that Sunday is the best day of the week. That’s stated in our podcasts. It’s stated in sermons. It’s stated in announcements. Over and over and over. Our people say it on a regular basis. That’s the first step in changing a culture.

Second, start acting like you are a family. So drop the gossip, the complaining, the back biting and all the negative things that causes tension, strife and leads to dysfunction. Connect with each other throughout the week. Start doing things with each other throughout the week. Invite others to go with you out to eat after Sunday services. This is key for the leaders to take the leading role in this. Talk is cheap if no actions back it up. If we are family, let’s act like a family. Love for each other. Support and help for each other. Build and strengthen your faith with others. Invite a few over and play games. Invite some over and sing hymns. Enjoy each other’s company without being compelled to “fix them,” “change them,” or make them more like you.

Third, pray for each other. Do this in your private prayers. This little activity causes you to think about others. Thinking about how you can encourage others. Think about how you can lift the spirit of others. Think about how you can be a blessing to others.

Don’t wait for others to start this. You be the first. The atmosphere of a family takes time to shape. And, as new faces come in, they must be included. They must feel that they are welcome. All of this takes some time and a lot of patience. Remember, God has included you in His family. So, open your heart and find room for others.

The church is not like a movie theatre. At the movies, we go for what is on the screen. We don’t really talk to anyone around us. We hope no one sits beside us. We watch the movie and we go home. Little or no interaction with those in attendance. The church is not like that. We want connections. We want fellowship. We need the encouragement. It is those things that make the church more like a family,

Roger

Jump Start # 2840

1 Timothy 3:15 “but in case I am delayed, I write so that you may know how one ought to conduct himself in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and support of truth.”

One of the things we learn as we read the writings of the apostles is that, although they were inspired by God, they did not have a crystal ball that told them everything about the future. Paul was planning to come to Ephesus where Timothy was. However, he might be delayed. Didn’t he know? No. Didn’t God tell him? No. The impression from moderns is that God directed detailed everyday events in the lives of Christians. They knew who to marry, when to buy a house and where to vacation. How would they know these things? Moderns believe that God revealed those things. It’s a wonder that we even need the Bible if God is telling each of us just what we need to do. Our verse reminds us that moderns have things mixed up. Paul didn’t know if he’d make his schedule to be with Timothy or if he would be delayed. He didn’t know.

In the event that he was delayed, Paul sent this letter, we commonly call, 1 Timothy. And, as our verse tells us, it was sent so Timothy would know how to “conduct himself in the household of God.” The household of God is not the church building. There were no church buildings back there. Paul is not saying, make sure the kids do not run in the hallways, and be sure the doors are locked when everyone leaves. Not at all.

Our passage follows the descriptive qualities of shepherds and deacons. Earlier Paul told Timothy to teach certain men not to teach strange doctrines. Later, he’d remind Timothy that people were not to make accusations against an elder without two or three witnesses. This is the conduct that Paul has in mind. It’s how we function and operate within a congregation. And, from this we find some important lessons:

First, the church does not have an “open mic” policy. Within Paul’s instructions about conducting ourselves within God’s church is holding to sound doctrine. Endless genealogies, myths, strange doctrines were not to be given a floor to air those agendas and thoughts. Freedom of speech is an American concept. God expects us to hold to the teachings of Christ and the apostles. Letting anyone say anything only feeds division, error and departures. Preach the word is what Timothy was told in the next letter to him.

Second, within the expression, ‘how one ought to conduct himself’ is implied a right way and a wrong way. We need to know the right way. We need to hold to the right way. Some things are just not proper in worship. Some things can take away the honor and praise that ought to go to God. Our attention needs to be Heavenward. But by our behavior and attitudes, that can be lost because we are not conducting ourselves as we ought to.

Third, Timothy, overseers and deacons– there were specific functions and roles for each of these. There was enough work to be done that no one needed to get in the way of the others. Part of this proper conduct is having a congregation functioning as God designed. In the absence of overseers, the church is vulnerable. We by necessity, develop men’s business meetings so things could be decided. Some congregations like that. Some would rather have that than what God designed, qualified overseers. But the downside of men’s business meetings is that every male Christian has a say. The young. The carnal. The weak. Those with false agendas. They all have a say and they all have a vote in the direction the church will follow. Equal votes for every person in the meeting. So, a ten year old boy who happens to be baptized, sitting right beside the preacher, or a former elder, has as much right and say by his vote as anyone else. It doesn’t take too much to see the trouble, danger and shortcomings of men’s meetings. Stack the room with people who will vote the way you want and the future of the church could be at stake.

This is why Paul was telling Timothy about how to conduct oneself in the household of God. God has a plan and it works. His plan is divine. Our ways are doomed to have problems.

Finally, when things are conducted rightly, it brings a pleasant feeling to us. We understand this in the family. Mom and dad are taking the family to visit someone. Strick instructions about the kids’ behavior is stressed over and over. The children are kind, gentle and well behaved. They are bragged upon about being so polite and well mannered. Mom and dad feel a since of pride because everyone has conducted themselves as they should. It’s the same for us spiritually. When we appreciate God’s order of things and we follow God’s pattern, things are beautiful. Worship becomes such a wholesome benefit. Encouragement, support, and love flow among the members. Unity is solid. Grace and forgiveness is practiced. God’s word is taught, loved and cherished. What a wonderful, wonderful experience and relationship that is. Those that hurt are cared for. Those that are worried are strengthened. Those that are slow are waited upon.

Conduct yourself is something that goes to all of us.

Roger

Jump Start # 1691

1 Timothy 3:15 “but in case I am delayed, I write so that you will know how one ought to conduct himself in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and support of the truth.”

Household—that word is used three times in 1 Timothy 3. It is first used to describe the character of an overseer or bishop. He is one who manages his own household well (v. 4). This is qualified with the expression, “keeping his children under control with all dignity.” It is used again in this chapter to describe deacons. They are to be good managers of their children and their households.

The way God uses the word “household” is what we would call family. Our family. Our families are influenced, guided, led, taught by parents. Mom, dad and the kids—that makes up families.

The third time the word “household” is used, our verse today, refers to the church. The household of God, which is the church. Paul was writing so one would know how to conduct himself in the church. He is not talking about running through the hallways of a church building. “The church,” refers to the saved. How are we to conduct ourselves with one another. He is driving at relationships. God’s household is much larger than one congregation. It’s made up of all the saved everywhere. These words describe the nature of how we are to interact, relate and respond to other Christians.

Now some thoughts:

It is easy to assume that the “household of God,” is nothing larger than the congregation we belong to. This is where most of our interaction with other Christians take place. Some can even see other congregations as rivals or in competition with each other. We all belong to God’s family. We are all in this together. We are trying to help God’s family, everywhere. Because we are of God’s household, we are all connected and related to each other through the blood of Jesus.

What hurts one part of the family, will hurt all the family. We understand this at home. A teenage daughter shouts at her mother, leaves the dinner table in a huff and slams her bedroom door, it affects the rest of the family. When a toddler has a melt down, it affects the rest of the family. When mom and dad are not getting along, it affects the rest of the family. We don’t see this spiritually. We don’t realize that if we hurt some spiritual family members, it hurts all the family. This is illustrated especially in two ways.

First, some get upset and they race to social media to air their complaints and trash talk fellow Christians. Are we not all of the same family? You hurt the family when that is done. Or, worse, they just leave in a mad fit, find another place to worship and spend the next few months telling anyone that will listen about how terrible the Christians are at the former place. Are we not all one family?

Second, preachers can be guilty of this without realizing it. They leave a congregation, making a mess, hurting others, to go to another congregation, often because the pay is better or the situation is better, and vast amounts of the Lord’s money is wasted moving these people across the country here and there and they leave a trail of bitterness and hurt feelings. Are we not all one family? You can’t hurt one part of the family without the rest of the family being affected as well.

  Third, there is something very special about family. Family reunions. Family vacations. Family that comes together at the holidays. We all have neighbors, co-workers, and friends, but nothing beats family. There is something special about family. You have a unique bond. You are blood. You know things. Fewer things can bring joy to one’s heart than the laughter and good times with family. Fewer things, likewise, hurt as much, as when family turns on you or is disappointed in you.

I find it interesting that the Holy Spirit used the same word, “household,” that was used to describe the family of both the overseer and the deacon, to describe God’s people. We are connected. We are special. We have a history. We love each other. Like the physical family, there are some things that we just don’t tell others. We support family. We are there to help family. Some of these concepts are hard to grasp in our times today. So many families are scattered, broken and dysfunctional. Murders take place among family members. The largest area of identity theft is among family members. Our brokenness, has resulted in families not being as strong nor as important as they once were. Family has been replaced with friends. Some do not even like their family. This makes the concept of “brothers” and “sisters” harder to appreciate, when we do not like our physical brothers and sisters. Family reunions are pretty much a thing for senior citizens. Younger folks don’t have the time nor the pull to connect with cousins that live in another state. These feelings trickle down to how we view one another in the church. We come on a Sunday morning, we smile at some, but take our place in a pew, much like a movie theatre, and we hope no one sits too close to us. We worship. We gather up our things and we go home. Done. Finished. Little thought given to those very people that we sang with and bowed our heads with. Announcements are made about some needing help. It doesn’t move us. We hear of those who are sick or having surgeries. Nothing is thought about that. Fellowship deteriorates into strangers who sit beside one another and barely know a thing about each other. This is not the way God intended it to be. Worse of all, this sad picture is found far too many times in our congregations, and rarely is there any thought of others outside our congregation. The household of God has shrunk to just the few strangers I see when I walk into the church building.

Independence and autonomy of congregations has led to isolation among too many of us. We don’t know and we don’t care what is going on with others outside of our immediate congregation. It is interesting that the book of Revelation was addressed to seven churches. All seven read about each other as they are described in the opening chapters. The books of Galatians, Ephesians, Corinthians became circulated letters that we even read about today. We learn about Tychicus, Epaphras, Onesimus—names that were associated with certain regions but became known by all the family of God.

There was a song in the early 70’s, “We are family, all my brothers, sisters and me.” And so we are. We are family. We need to help each other. We need to be there for each other. We need to get that family concept going again. The blood of Jesus ties us all together. The blood of Jesus makes us all one. It’s time for some to stop pointing fingers and extend the warm handshake of friendship. The enemy is not us.

Conducting ourselves in the household of God. There is a lot to that expression. Chew on that a while. Think about that. How are you doing with that? God’s family. You are a part of that. Amazing. Incredible. Comes with responsibilities toward others. Comes with privileges from Heaven. Sons and daughters of God, that’s who we are. Let’s act that way!

Roger