Jump Start # 1663

1 Peter 2:18 “Servants be submissive to your masters with all respect, not only to those who are good and gentle, but also to those who are unreasonable”

Our verse is a tough one today. It’s not hard to understand, it’s hard to do. Peter is addressing slave-master relationships, and thankfully, in the Western world, that doesn’t exist anymore. It’s hard to “own” someone and live the golden rule. The Bible never directly condemned slavery, but the principles that it creates within a heart of a person will lead to that. It is easy therefore to dismiss these verses because I am not a slave nor do I own slaves. But there are principles here that cross all relationships, including home, work and church.

It is easy to be nice to those who are good and gentle. But what about the “unreasonable” people? Those who are not good. Those who are not gentle. They may come in the form of a boss, a parent, a husband, or a friend. Unreasonable. Unreasonable demands expected of you. Unreasonable guilt. Unreasonable. “They’re killing us at work,” is a common expression I hear. More work. Less help. Running at break neck speed. Little time for lunch. Some do not even get bathroom breaks. Forget what the law says, unreasonable work loads won’t allow that. The simple answer is quit. Sure, and then do what? Then how are we to survive?

Unreasonable. It comes from families at holidays who expect you to make the whirlwind tour of seeing people who you barely know but because they are “family” you are expected to be there. Unreasonable guilt. Unreasonable demands from a mate who is inconsiderate of you.

Peter may be talking about slaves but we know all too well the world of “unreasonable.” In Titus, we also find, “Urge bondslaves to be subject to their own masters in everything, to be well-pleasing, not argumentative, not pilfering, but showing all good faith so that they will adorn the doctrine of God our Savior in every respect” (2:9). Be subject. Be well-pleasing. And then, “not argumentative.” Again, don’t limit these thoughts to just the slave-master relationship. It is inconsistent to think that the Christian slave should not be argumentative, but the Christian free man could. Don’t be argumentative. That’s one I have to work on. I tend to be a rebel at spirit. I can fuss with the best of them. Don’t, is what the passage is telling us. That’s tough at home. I’ve seen this spill over in the church. In a Bible class, people arguing, and not being nice about it.

There is an African proverb that states, “When two elephants fight, the grass suffers.” I like that. You can only imagine how the dust flies in the air when two large bull elephants are going after each other. They will fight for position and after a while, the score is settled and they move on with the rest of the elephants. But the aftermath is visibly seen in the dirt and grass. They tore the place up. It will take a while for the land to recover.

Unreasonable people can make us become argumentative. Remember, the grass suffers.

The grass may be the small children who run to their rooms when they hear mom and dad fighting. The raised voices, the insults, the hurtful tones, scares the little ones. The grass suffers.

The grass may be the new Christian who witnesses ugliness among brethren. He hears mean things being said. He sees people avoiding others on purpose. He witnesses insults and name calling among those who are supposed to be of the same family in Christ. The grass suffers.

The grass may be the co-worker who knows that you are a Christian, but sees you tear into someone and argue all the time. They become confused and disillusioned about Christianity. The light isn’t shinning very bright when we act this way. The grass suffers.

And it often takes a long time for the grass to recover.

There are times to stand your ground. There are times to defend your position. But do so with respect, gentleness and kindness. Don’t destroy a person, so you get what you want. The grass suffers. Your points are made more sensible and right by the volume of your voice. Shouting louder and louder doesn’t prove your point. Insulting a person. Attacking their character. Bringing up the past. This is the way third graders behave. It is the way politicians behave. We are Christians. We must rise above that.

In a perfect world, there are no unreasonable people and never a need to be argumentative. But this world isn’t perfect. Mr. Roger’s is gone. Not everyone is nice in the neighborhood. Living among unreasonable people is hard. It tries our patience and tests our faith. There are days that we just want to scream, but you don’t. There are days you could just punch someone, but you won’t. There are days that you can’t wait to be over.

I have found that it is hard to reason with unreasonable people. Often, their minds are closed, made up and not willing to listen to any other ideas or options. It’s their way or the highway. Their way won’t work. Their way is too expensive. Their way adds to your burdens. This is especially hard when the unreasonable person is a boss, or in Peter’s words, your master. The slave back in the first century had no options. There was  no labor board to call. There was no union rep to step in. There was no one. The slave was viewed as a tool, much like a shovel. If the tool breaks, get another. Little thought was given to how the slave felt or how he was doing. Motivation often came from a whip. Philemon’s slave ran away. Paul sent him back. Paul reminded Philemon to be a Christian. He let him know that the run-away was now a Christian. He was to treat him as a fellow Christian.

What to do with the unreasonable folks in your life? Pray, first of all. Pray for understanding. Pray for yourself. Pray for them. Look for ways to show kindness. Some can see how they have been and change. Others won’t get it, even if Jesus were to knock on their front door. They live in their own world and everything is about them and only them. Don’t get into a marriage with someone like that. You will feel like a slave and be treated like a slave. Keep your eyes open for another job. It may take time. You don’t have to spend time with every idiot in the family because mom guilts you into that. Let her go visit them. Some people we would have nothing to do with, except they happen to share the same last name. Some relationships are toxic and they beat us down spiritually.

Unreasonable people…argumentative…grass that suffers.

It’s good to remember those things.

Roger